Reflections at 65

Yesterday I completed my sixty fifth year on this earth. It seems hard to believe it’s been that long, yet at the same time it feels like a long time has past. There have been a lot of changes over the years, in me and in the world around me. When I was born, Dwight Eisenhower was President. Many more have come and gone, some good, some bad. Communication has gone from rotary phones with party lines to Dick Tracy style wrist watches with video calling. Back then, a zoom meeting meant driving fast across town to a particular location. Wars used to be fought in person, now they are sometimes fought remotely.

Over the years, I have gone from being a rail thin youngster to a chubby middle age man to a slightly slimmer senior. I used to be athletic, now my knees ache when I get up in the morning. As a matter of fact, a good bit of my body aches in the morning. I have finally learned that when my mind tells me I can do something that I used to be able to do, I shouldn’t listen. My body always disagrees with my mind, and it is usually right. I have had the opportunity to continue my athletic career as a coach, and been able to coach some pretty good athletes, including my children. Because I coached, I also drove buses and have been able to turn that into in-between jobs, and finally into the job I have now.

I have learned a few things along the way. Some of them are important and some are good answers to trivia questions. I have learned that a great many of the things we think are vital are not, and some of the things we think are inconsequential are extremely important. Even though I still get upset more than I should, I have come to realize that there are really very few things in this life worth getting upset about. More and more, my philosophy is boiling down to, like Karl Barth, Jesus loves me this I know, for the Bible tells me so, along with love God and others. I have found that holding those thngs closely makes things simpler and more complex. I do believe if more of those of us who call ourselves Christians would live in the realization that we are loved by God and are to love him and our neighbor, this world would be a much better place.

I am truly blest by the Father. He has given me a wonderful wife, two fantastic chidlren, and three of the best grandchildren in the world, with one more on the way. Jan and I are part of a beautiful community of fellow Jesus followers. I have been able to do things that I loved, both in work and play. I have seen some amazing things and met some amazing people. As the years have gone by, I have become more and more grateful for all my blessings and for all the lessons I have learned, even the hard ones.

None of us knows what the future holds. That is not in our hands. I am thankful that my loving Father has the future in his hands. I hope to spend many more years traveling the back roads of life trying to keep up with Jesus.

What Can We Do?

In the October 15 issue of the New York Times, David Brooks writes an opinion piece titled, How to Actually Make America Great.” In the piece, he writes about a new book, The Upswing, written by Robert D. Putnam and Shaylyn Romney Garrett, which chronicles the changes in American life from about 1870 to today. The book looks at a wide range of sectors of American life as a whole rather than as separate entities.

The authors find that American social trends improved from 1870 up to the late 1960s. All of the indicators of good life improved, from civic particpation to church attendance. Income inequality fell and the greatest improvements in the lives of African Americans happened duriing this period. All of that changed and began to reverse in the late 60s. Why? Was it economic inequality or political dysfunction?

According to Putnam and Garrett, the problems began when the word “I” began to take the place of “we” in the minds of Americans. America began to turn from solidarity to individualism. The frequency of the word “I” in American books doubled between 1965 and 2008. We began to be more self-centered, whether it was those on the left who celebrated the freedom to do their own thing socially, or those on the right who celebrated the freedom to do their own thing economically. Everyone began to look after their own self interests while forgetting the interests of others.

Obviously, this was not a total change. Their were, and are, folks who spend their lives looking out and caring for others. Non-profits and other groups that help others have not disappeared. However, the culture as a whole has become much more self-centered. All you have to do is look at the advertising on television or radio. It’s geared toward those who want more for themselves. Even much of the political ads are pointed at the interests of the voter. “Candidate X will raise your taxes, while candidate Z will let you keep more of your money.” “Vote for this person, because if they are elected, the economy will soar and your stocks will increase in value.”

I see a lot of this in the wider Church in America. A gospel is preached that tells the person to ask Jesus into their heart to be their “personal Savior,” so that they can go to heaven when they die. The emphasis is on the individual. Much of what passes for “discipleship” in many churches is focused on the individual’s walk with God. I don’t see a lot about an individual walk with God in the Scriptures. although it is true that I personally am called to follow Jesus. All through the Bible, those who are called are called to be part of a family, whether it’s the family of Israel in the Old Testament, or the new family of God which includes Jew and Gentile in the New Testament. Christians are described as members of a family with God as our Father, as members of the body of Christ, and as fellow citizens of a Kingdom ruled by sacrficial love for others. It is in community that discipleship happens, as we learn and grow together.

The emphasis in the Bible is on the interconnectedness of those who follow Jesus, and the command to love others and put their interests ahead of our own. That is countercultural in a world that puts self first. But then, we are called to show a better way of being truly human. The early Christians lived in a world that was very self absorbed, much like our world today. Rather than buying the bill of goods the world was offering, they threw their lot in with the true King who gave his life for others. In doing so, they gave their lives for others and turned the world upside down.

May God grant us the desire to live as ambassadors of the Kingdom that conquers through sacrificial love and not selfish power.

Shadow and Hope

In The Return of the King, the hobbits Frodo and Sam are near the end of their journey into the land of Shadow in their attempt to destrtoy the One Ring. They have journeyed far, through hunger and thirst, battles with spiders and orcs, and the near overwhelming despair that lies heavy on Mordor. Now more than ever, the quest seems to be a fool’s errand. They don’t know if they will ever reach their destination, or if it will matter if they do.

One night, as Frodo sleeps, Sam looks up at the sky above him:

Far above the Ephel Duath in the West the night sky was still dim and pale. There, peeping among the cloud-wrack above a dark tor high up in the mountains, Sam saw a white star twinkle for a while. The beauty of it smote his heart, as he looked up out of that forsaken land, and hope returned to him. For like a shaft, clear and cold, the thought pierced him that in the end the Shadow was only a small and passing thing; there was light and high beauty for ever beyond its reach.

There is talk going around in some circles that if (fill in the name) gets elected, or re-elected, a Shadow will cover our land and our nation as we know it will cease to exist. When you think about it, this has been the fear of some for a number of election cycles. The language used to describe candiates on either side comes close to the language used to describe Sauron and his minions. These people, whoever “these people” may be, are the scourge of the earth and are worthy only of hatred and contempt. We are told to fear those who disagree with us, because their ideas will enslave us in some sort of socialist, fascist, anarchist, dictatorial, etc. distopia.

What there seems to be a short supply of, is hope. People talk about what country they are going to flee to if a certain party wins (although I don’t know if anyone has ever actually done that). Now, I can understand a lack of hope from those who have all their dreams tied into a certain way of seeing the world, who have pledged their allegiance to a system or person. What I don’t understand is when some of that despairing language comes from the mouths of those who claim to follow the One who brings hope. I realize that some of that is done to raise money to put in the coffers of certain organizations, or because they want to keep a privileged position. That doesn’t make it any less sad.

Think of that Friday afternoon a little over two thousand years ago, when the disciples of Jesus thought that they had lost all hope. They had hitched their wagon to the star of this man they believed was going to restore the kingdom to Israel and make it great again. Now he was dead, and it seemed as if their whole world had come crashing down around them. They, like many today, had a misplaced hope.

If you are a follower of Jesus, if you have pledged your allegiance to the King of Kings, then whatever happens in this election or in any other year should not lessen your hope one iota. Our hope is in the One who went into death and came out the other side victorious. Jesus is King and no matter who occupies the White House, the Capitol, or the Supreme Court, our mission as ambassadors of the Kingdom of God does not change. We are still called to make disciples. That may well get more difficult in the years to come, but it is still our calling. If everything hits the fan and this nation does crunble, as all empires have so far, we are still citizens of the Kingdom that will never be shaken and have a hope that always endures. Because Jesus is King, the Shadow is only a small and passing thing and there is a light and high beauty for ever beyond its reach.

Hope in the Lord, and your hopes will never be crushed.

Thinking

This is the beginning of a reflective, even somewhat sad, period. Those of you that know me, know that I tend to wear my heart on my sleeve and feel things deeply. The time from Thanksgiving to Christmas has always been an emotional time for me. Family is important to me, and family is what that time of year is all about.

Fourteen years ago today, my mother died from Alzheimer’s Disease. Thirty three days later, my father joined her. Thanksgiving and Christmas that year were tough. My emotions were right on the edge most of that time. Even though it has been fourteen years, there is still emotion. There is still a sadness, although the good memories are mixed in, in a greater proportion. In October, 2009, Jan’s mom passed away. That added another layer to the grieving and healing process. Jan’s dad left this life in May, 2016, so none of them are around to share in the family celebrations. They say that time heals all wounds. I’m not totally sure that is true. I think time can bring healing, but the wounds are never completely gone. I do believe that our pain and sorrow can be transformed, and we can be better for them.

The sad time, if you want to call it that, begins a little earlier now. Last week, our dog Charlie died. He had been a faithful companion to our family for the past thirteen years. While losing a pet obviously is not the same as losing a person, there is still a hole left behind. All of those things added together leads to good memories mixed with regret, to happiness mixed with sadness. Something will happen, or someone will say something, and emotions will be triggered. Certain dates become more important than others.

I am thankful that my heavenly Father knows all things, and is gracious and loving. I am thankful for the knowledge that our parents are resting with him and are not suffering. I am grateful for the good memories we have, and for what we can learn from the not so good ones. I can look back and see how things in my past have, in some way, shaped who I am today. As I go into this season, I can look back and see how God is truly working all things for my good and for his glory. I am grateful for that.

Forty Years and Counting

It was a different time. The nation had experienced some healing from Vietnam and Watergate. The economy was not in very good shape. Iran held Americans hostage. The Reagan Revolution was just a soon to be realized dream for the Republican Party. The Miracle on Ice was a recent memory and the Summer Olympics would take place without the United States, as well as a number of other countries.

We were different as well. We both were much younger and both of us had more hair. Jan’s hair is simply shorter, while mine is simply gone and my beard is now white. We were both teachers then, and while Jan has kept her hand in, I have bounced around among a variety of jobs.

During these last forty years, we have lived in a number of different homes in three cities. We began life as a couple in the Washington, DC area, spent some time in the Cincinnati area, where our family grew from two to four. For the last twenty five years we have called the small city of Rock Hill home. Our son and daughter grew up here, and left the nest to pursue their own path. In the ensuing years, we buried our parents, moved on to new jobs, and found a community of faith that has become a family.

Through the years, much has changed. We have been on the heights, and we have been through the valleys. This journey together has not always been an easy one, and the road has always been winding. There have been times of plenty, and times when we struggled financially. We have never been “wealthy” in the usual sense, but God has always provided. We have argued and been angry with one another, and made up and moved on.

What has never changed is our love and commitment to each other. As our lives took the twists and turns, we knew that the other one was with us and we were on this journey together, come hell or high water. We learned to communicate and that has been a major factor in our marriage. We still face the challenges of life. Both of us are growing older and dealing with those issues. Jan’s HD is a big challenge. But we are facing these things together, as we have always faced life. We are trusting our heavenly Father to take care of us, as he always has.

Forty years. It seems like a long time, over half of our lives, yet it somehow feels like a blip on the screen of time. We may celebrate another forty years, we may not. No matter how many more years God gives us, I know that I am truly blessed to be married to a beautiful woman who is a wonderful partner.

Jan, I am so thankful to the Father for bringing us together and allowing us to spend these years together as one, and I pray he gives us many more years to journey through this life.

I love you more than yesterday, and less than tomorrow.

Father’s Day 2020

Thirty seven years ago, our son was born and I became a father. Even though thirty seven years seems like a long time (it is over half my life), as I look back it really doesn’t feel like all that long ago. Because there are so many memories, they crowd together and make the time seem somehow compressed, as if the years have joined together and decreased their number.

There have been a lot of changes over those years. We added a daughter three years later. There have been different jobs, as I went back and forth between working as a teacher and coach and various other jobs. Some times were tough financially, and I felt sorry that we couldn’t do everything we wanted as a family, or for our children. God has always provided for us, but there were times when there wasn’t any extra. What I value most about the teaching/coaching gigs are the opportunities provided when it came to Josh and Jennie. We all had the same vacation schedule, and went to the same place every morning during the school year. I had the opportunity to coach both of them, something I will always cherish.

It has been an absolute joy to see both of them grow up into responsible, caring people. I have always been proud of them, no more so than now. I see Jesus in them in the way they interact with others, and in the way they care for those around them. When they were growing up, I was always known as “Josh’s and Jennie’s dad,” and I am still proud to wear that title.

Now I am blessed to have another title: “Granddaddy.” That makes this day even more special. I get to participate in some way in the raising up of the next generation, and for that I am grateful. I have no worries because I know that my grandchildren are in good hands.

Josh and Jennie, I am so proud and thankful for the privilege of being your father. I thank God for you and pray that you will know his love in increasing measure in the days and years ahead. I love you.