Category: reconciliation

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Repentance: The Other Side of the Coin

Last week, I wrote here about the importance of forgiveness. Forgiveness is a vital, ongoing part of life as a follower of Jesus. There is another side to that coin. Along with being people who are known for forgiveness, we are called to be folks who are known for repentance.

Repentance is one of those concepts that we sometimes have a hard time defining. It is definitely one of those things that we have a hard time doing. Repentance is usually defined as being sorry for our sins. That is part of it, however I believe being people of repentance and creating a culture of repentance in our communities calls us to go much further. Of course, this is just my belief, although I am convinced that it is informed by Scripture. Your results may vary.

The Greek word “metanoeo,” usually translated “repent” means to change one’s mind, or to turn away from. It is turning away from a way of thinking and acting that brings death and turning to life. Jesus told people to turn from their way of thinking about the kingdom of God and turn to God`s way, the way of the Messiah. The Sermon on the Mount lays out the essentials of the kingdom way of life.

When I look at the way Jesus calls us to live I see a life of repentance. We need to repent and turn away from sins we commit or from heart attitudes that are not pleasing to God. I would contend that there will be times when we need to turn away from words and actions that may hurt or offend someone, even if there is not sin involved, and even if the hurt was inadvertant. We are told to do everything we can to live at peace with others. Jesus said that we are to go to anyone we know has something against us, even if that means leaving religious duties. He also tells us that we are to be as shrewd as snakes and harmless as doves. In our relationships, we are to be smart and awake to the effect we have on others and be harmless in our dealings.

I believe that we should be known as people who are quick to repent and even quicker to forgive. Our churches and communities should be known as communities of repentance, forgiveness, and reconciliation, fueled by the mutual, sacrificial love of Christ. Think of what that would look like!

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Wisdom From Don Henley

As you may know, I believe that all truth is God’s truth and that truth can come from many different places. In Don Henley’s song, “The Heart of the Matter,” there is a bit of truth about forgiveness. The song is about a lost love, but there is something there for all of us who have been hurt by other people.

Henley sings, “The more I know, the less I understand / All the things I thought I knew, I’m learning again.” Those words speak volumes to me. It seems that the older I get the less I understand about some things, especially when it comes to people. Sometimes the more we know about someone, the less we understand what they do. That is one reason we need forgiveness, whether given or received.

 The song goes on:

These times are so uncertain/ There’s a yearning undefined/
…People filled with rage/ We all need a little tenderness/
How can love survive in such a graceless age/
The trust and self-assurance that can lead to happiness/
They’re the very things we kill, I guess
We live in uncertain times. Those of us who follow Jesus face an uncertain future that may include persecution and definitely will include a loss of the influence the church has enjoyed. Because we are family, we must be a family that forgives. The age is quickly becoming more and more graceless, and forgiveness is necessary for love to survive.
In some way, Henley gets it: 
“I’ve been trying to get down to the heart  of the matter
But my will gets weak/ And my thoughts seem to scatter
But I think it’s about forgiveness
Even if you don’t love me anymore
He recognizes the vital importance of forgiveness:
There are people in your life who’ve come and gone
They let you down and hurt your pride
Better put it all behind you; life goes on
You keep carryin’ that anger, it’ll eat you inside
We have all been hurt by people, whether it’s an abusive parent or spouse, a tyrannical boss, or a friend who has betrayed us. Some of those hurts heal relatively quickly while some will never be totally healed until God wipes all tears from our eyes. Some folks we can reconcile with, while with others reconciliation is impossible. The one thing we can do is forgive. Like the Amish in Pennsylvania, the people in Rwanda, or the formerly oppressed majority in South Africa, we can forgive. We must forgive. If we don’t, it will eat away at us and cause issues for the rest of our life.
Forgiveness is more about us than the person we are forgiving. By forgiving, we release the other from any hold their act still has on us. We also release ourselves. We do incur a cost by giving up our “right” to extract a pound of flesh, but that pound of flesh can never pay for their act and forgiving frees us and enables us to move on with our lives. We are no longer bound to that act or that person. We also must forgive because our Father has forgiven us far worse trespasses than any of us have ever felt. Jesus command us to forgive and reminds us that forgiving is an indication of our own forgiveness. We must forgive. For the glory of God and the advance of his kingdom, for the good of others, and for our own wholeness. It’s not easy, but it must be a part of our lives.
There is another side to this coin. That is repentance. That’s a subject for another post.
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Echoes of Eden in Avengers: Age of Ultron

In Echoes of Eden, Jerram Barrs writes:
      In fact, we may propose as a principal that the themes of all great art-
      -whether produced by Christians or by non-Christians– are the world 
      and human life as they came from from the hand of God; the world
      and human life as they now are subject to sorrow, sin, and death; and
      the world and human life as we long for and look forward to their restoration.

In “Avengers: Age of Ultron,” the last two themes are evident. The Avengers are in a battle with an individual who is bent on ruling and/or destroying the world. Upon invading the headquarters of their adversary, the heroes take a piece of Norse mythology that is extremely powerful. Iron Man, aka Tony Stark, sees this as the final piece in his dream of creating a peaceful world without fear. He attempts to join the program that was captured with his own program in an attempt to create an artificial intelligence that would be the ultimate peacekeeper.

Unfortunately, the attempt goes awry, as all human attempts do. History is littered with the wreckage of man’s efforts to bring about the ultimate peace. That longing still persists, as the movie ends with new recruits joining the Avengers in the ongoing attempt to protect the world and bring peace. We who follow Jesus see that longing played out in our attempts to be the peacemakers Jesus calls us to be. Sometimes we try to do this in our own strength and wisdom. The result often turns out the same as that of Tony Stark’s misguided effort.

Should we give up trying to be peacemakers and seeking reconciliation? Should governments abandon efforts to negotiate
peace? I believe the answer is no. We should seek and work for peace and reconciliation whenever we can. As we do so, we must remember that it is the Spirit of Christ who is the ultimate peace giver, whether between individuals or nations. We also need to realize that the peace we seek may not be realized in this life. Of course, the ultimate peace and restoration of this world and human life will only happen when Christ returns and fully establishes the Kingdom.

Until then we will continue to hear echoes of Eden in music, film, art, literature, and in our own hearts. We can be encouraged, because we know that some day we will hear more than just echoes.

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C’mon People…

A few years ago, The Youngbloods finished the phrase with, “Smile on your brother / Everybody get together / Try to love one another / Right now.” It wouldn’t be a bad idea for those of us who follow Jesus to take a closer look at this song and see if we can glean any wisdom.

The song begins with the words, “Love is but a song we sing / And fear’s the way we die / You can make the mountains ring / Or make the angels cry.” When you look at the very basis of Christianity, you find love. God loves us and he calls us to love others. All of God’s law is summed up in the commands to love God and to love others. Love is the song we sing. Why don’t we love like we should? Fear. We fear the other. We fear loss of face. We fear being taken advantage of. We fear any number of things that may happen if we love. So, we don’t love. And, we die. As C. S. Lewis said, “But in that casket, safe, dark, motionless, airless, it will change. It will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable.” If we love, God is glorified. The mountains sing. If we don’t love, God is dishonored. The angels cry.

As the song goes on, we are told  that we are just “a moment’s sunlight, fading in the grass.” Our time here in this life is short, yet we tend to waste it on things instead of spending it on, and for others. We only get a limited amount of time to love those whom God has placed in our lives, yet we spend that time focusing on our interests and desires, building our kingdoms rather than building for the kingdom of heaven. As the song continues, we see that we “hold the key to love and fear / All in your trembling hand / Just one key unlocks them both / It’s there at your command.” We are the ones who are called to cast off fear and love. We are the ones who can love because we have the Spirit of the resurrected Christ in us.

Loving others is not an easy thing to do. It will be messy. You will get hurt. Nietzsche said that Christian love looks like weakness, and it opens us up to manipulation and abuse. He’s right. Look at Jesus’ command to forgive over and over again. Look at Jesus’ statement that the greatest love was laying down one’s life for our brothers and sisters. Look at Jesus asking the Father to forgive those who were murdering him in the worst manner possible. It does look like weakness. It does leave us open to abuse. But it is the way of the King and his kingdom.

Let us love as we are loved.

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Easter: Hope and Challenge

Easter is a time of great celebration. It is the pinnacle of the Church year, a day when we remember the resurrection of our Savior. Why do we celebrate? Why do we make such a big deal of this day? I would suggest that we celebrate for two reasons. The Resurrection gives us hope for the future, and it gives us hope and a challenge for today.

We have a hope for the future. Jesus said that he is the resurrection and the life, and that those who believe in him will never die. The apostle Paul tells us that Jesus’ resurrection means that we too shall be raised. When the kingdom of heaven comes in its fulfillment, we will be raised to never die. The resurrection of Jesus is the foundation of our future hope.

We also have a challenge and a hope for our day-to-day. When you look at the gospel accounts of the Resurrection, what you don’t see are mentions of the future hope. The followers of Jesus don’t say, “Jesus has been raised, so we will be raised from the dead and live with him forever.” That is in the rest of the New Testament, but the sense of the first disciples was more about now. Jesus is raised, so he is the Messiah. Jesus is raised, so new creation has begun. Jesus is raised, so we have a job to do. We are called to be heralds of this new kingdom.

Easter changes everything! The restoration has begun! We are subjects of a new kingdom, a kingdom of love, repentance, forgiveness, reconciliation. It is a kingdom in which we lay down our lives for our King and for others. It is a kingdom that puts loving God and loving others ahead of everything else. That is the challenge. There is hope along with the challenge.

The cross calls us to come and die. The empty tomb calls us to find that we can truly live. Because Jesus is raised, his Spirit is now in us, so we can die daily. We can give up our wishes, our desires, our comfort, our need to be right, our self-righteousness. We can show the world the truth, beauty, and goodness of Jesus by the way we love.

While we may live in the in-between time before the restoration is complete, we can live as Easter people because Jesus is raised. Let us begin to live in the power of the Resurrection today.

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My Prayer

Abba Father, let your name be glorified in us, in our work and play, in what we say and do, in our relationships with our brothers and sisters.

Your kingdom is a kingdom of love, forgiveness, and reconciliation, a kingdom of healing and wholeness. Let that kingdom come to our relationships as it is in heaven. Your will is that your children be one. Let that will be done in us as in heaven.

Give us each day what we need. Give us sustenance, grace, and faith.

Forgive us our sins, against you and against others. Help us to forgive those who sin against us, as many times as is necessary.

Don’t let us give in to the temptation to build ourselves up at the expense of others, to prove that we are right and others are wrong, to hold grudges. Deliver us from evil.

Help us to remember that it is your kingdom, your power, and your glory forever and ever.

Amen.

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Forgiveness and Reconciliation

I’ve been thinking a bit about forgiveness and reconciliation, and I have come to the conclusion that it is one of the biggest problems in our relationships with others, both in and out of the church. I also believe that very few of us really understand what it means to forgive and be reconciled. There are times when I struggle with this myself.

I believe that forgiveness goes much deeper than most of us know. So often, we see forgiveness as the kind of thing where we simply don’t hold something against another. And, there may be times when that is the case, such as when the other person has died. For those of us who follow Jesus, forgiveness also carries the idea of reconciliation. Again, there will be instances where that simply is not possible.

When Peter asks Jesus how many times he should forgive someone who sins against him, Jesus replied that he was to forgive 49 or 490 times. The number is not really the issue. Jesus is telling us that we are to forgive others, especially our family in Christ, as many times as necessary. That presupposes a relationship with that person. That’s where reconciliation comes in.

In Matthew 5:23-24, Jesus tells us that being reconciled with a brother or sister in Christ is a higher priority than worship. If there is something in the way of our relationship with another, we are to get that right before we come present our worship to God. I believe Scripture goes even farther. In 2 Corinthians 5:16-21, Paul tells us that Christ has reconciled us to God. When we come to Jesus and become a member of God’s family, he doesn’t say to us, “Well, you’re forgiven and all that, so I won’t punish you. But, I don’t really want you around. I forgive you, but I don’t want to have a relationship with you, so stay away.” On the contrary, God welcomes us into a close relationship with him. He is pleased to be called our Father. As our Father pursues us and reconciles us to himself, so his children should pursue reconciliation with our brothers and sisters.

Beyond the family relationship, in 1 Corinthians 12 Paul tells us that we are all members of the same body. He even goes so far as to say that we are members of one another! I don’t totally understand what all that means, but is seems that our relationships with our fellow followers of Jesus are pretty important. Jesus said that the world would know that we belong to him by our love for one another. I fear that what the world sees is a lot of infighting, anger, bitterness, and a lack of forgiveness. Can we expect those outside to want what we have when it doesn’t seem to make much difference in what are our most important relationships?

God help us to seek reconciliation and show the love of Christ to a watching world.

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World Vision Wednesday

It has been twenty years since the genocide in Rwanda. A great deal of healing has taken place, but there is still much that remains to be done. For a report on what has been accomplished, go here.

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Let’s Dance

The Trinity has been described as a “divine dance.” The word in Greek is perichoresis, a word meaning to dance around. This divine dance describes the relationship between the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit. It is a relationship of mutual love and service, a relationship in which each one is centered around the other. This can be symbolized in the triquetra and other designs that show three interlocking rings, triangles, or fish symbols. The Trinity is a relationship that gives to the other, exalts the other, and serves the other.

As we begin to follow Jesus, we are invited to join in this dance. God created us, not to give God joy, but to receive the joy that already existed within the Trinity. We join in this perichoresis, this divine dance, by centering our selves in God. We recognize that it’s not all about us, but that it is all about God. Ultimate reality can only be found in God. We are invited to play a part in that reality and join in God’s story. It’s mind blowing to think that the Creator wants us to be a part of what he is doing to restore the creation and reconcile all things.

This invitation also has implications for us as we enter into the dance. The first is realizing that our lives are to revolve around God. God is to be the sun around which we orbit. As a baby learns that the world doesn’t revolve around him, so must we. We are to be all about doing the will of the Father as Jesus was. We are to seek his interests, exalt him, and give ourselves to him. We are to love God with every fiber of our beings. As we enter more and more into this dance, we find that forgetting about ourselves and orbiting around God is a joy rather than a drudgery.

The second implication is that we must also remember that there are others who are in this dance with us. Our brothers and sisters in Christ are dancing as well, and those who haven’t come to faith in Christ are to be invited to join us. That means that in our relationships with other people, we are not to expect them to orbit around us. We do not expect them to give to us, build us up, or serve us. The opposite is true. As we dance, we recognize that we are to orbit around them. Their interests, their needs, their good is what we are to be about. This means we are to forget about ourselves. That is a hard thing to do. Our natural tendency is to make sure that we get ours, and then maybe we’ll give to others. We do this with our money, most obviously. We also do this with our time and energy, and our talents and gifts.

I believe this lack of dancing correctly is a major reason why churches are ineffectual, and why community is so hard to find. A group of folks who expect everyone else to orbit around them and their interests will quickly fall into conflict and will cease to exist. It is only in the dance God has called us to that we can truly find the love and acceptance we all desire. It is only when we forget ourselves and dance in our orbits around God and around others, that we find joy. The old children’s song that spelled “joy” as Jesus, others, and you, was actually pretty much on the money. That is the dance, moving in and out, around and around, in a constant relationship of mutual love and service.

Lets dance!

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The Prodigal Son: Becoming the Father

In The Return of the Prodigal Son, Henri Nouwen writes that the challenge for him is to become the father. It is a challenge that is full of difficulties. When we look again at the Father in our own stories, we can see how daunting it is.

Our Father is gracious and loving without condition. He gives us many good gifts, but the most important gift he gives is himself. The Father is reckless in giving himself to us. Jesus, who is the image of the Father, gave his very life for us, pouring out his blood for our salvation. We are granted grace and mercy without measure from an eternal, inexhaustible love. There is nothing our Father wouldn’t do for our good.

As children of God, we are called to be like him. When I look in a mirror, I see my dad. The eyes, the facial features, the hair (or lack thereof), the voice, all show whose son I am. The same is to be true of those who are children of the heavenly Father. As God is loving and compassionate, so we are to be loving and compassionate. As God is gracious and merciful, so we are to be gracious and merciful. As God gives himself, so we are to give ourselves. You get the idea.

In my late twenties my life changed as I became a father. Even though I was still a son, I was now a person with a child. That brought a change in responsibilities, and a change in perspective. As we mature in Christ, we are to leave both the prodigal and the elder son behind. We are still in need of fathering from God, but our vocation changes. We are now called to be the father. As I look at the father in the story, I see some things that will be true as we become the father. Nouwen states that the three ways to compassionate fatherhood are grief, forgiveness, and generosity.  

We grieve over those who have left home, we grieve over the injustice and abuse in the world, and we grieve over our own weakness. One aspect of grieving is realizing that we cannot save the one who has wandered away. The father in the story didn’t go after his son, but he watched and waited for him to return. So it is with us. Many times, all we can do is pray that God will turn the prodigal around. We can not go into the far country and drag them back. All we can do is wait and be ready to welcome them home.

This grieving makes us sensitive to others who are hurting, and the sensitivity leads us to forgive those who wrong us. As the father did, we forgive without question any and all who return. As Jesus said, we forgive, and forgive, and forgive, and forgive, and so on. True forgiveness also reconciles. The father didn’t say to the prodigal, “I forgive you, but I think I’ll just keep you on as a servant.” He accepted him back as his beloved son. No strings attached.

The third way to compassionate fatherhood is generosity. The father spared nothing to celebrate his son’s return. He gave the best of everything, including himself. We are called to give ourselves to others in the same way. Yes, we may get hurt. I’m sure the father was hurt when the elder son refused to join the party, and I would guess the younger son wasn’t perfect after he was restored. He may well have cause his father more pain. We are to remember the hurt we have caused our Father and the grace he gives us regardless, and do the same for others.

May the Father enable us to be as gracious, loving, and compassionate to others as he is to us.