In our gathering this week, we looked at the righteousness that is a part of the Kingdom of God.
Reflections at 65
Yesterday I completed my sixty fifth year on this earth. It seems hard to believe it’s been that long, yet at the same time it feels like a long time has past. There have been a lot of changes over the years, in me and in the world around me. When I was born, Dwight Eisenhower was President. Many more have come and gone, some good, some bad. Communication has gone from rotary phones with party lines to Dick Tracy style wrist watches with video calling. Back then, a zoom meeting meant driving fast across town to a particular location. Wars used to be fought in person, now they are sometimes fought remotely.
Over the years, I have gone from being a rail thin youngster to a chubby middle age man to a slightly slimmer senior. I used to be athletic, now my knees ache when I get up in the morning. As a matter of fact, a good bit of my body aches in the morning. I have finally learned that when my mind tells me I can do something that I used to be able to do, I shouldn’t listen. My body always disagrees with my mind, and it is usually right. I have had the opportunity to continue my athletic career as a coach, and been able to coach some pretty good athletes, including my children. Because I coached, I also drove buses and have been able to turn that into in-between jobs, and finally into the job I have now.
I have learned a few things along the way. Some of them are important and some are good answers to trivia questions. I have learned that a great many of the things we think are vital are not, and some of the things we think are inconsequential are extremely important. Even though I still get upset more than I should, I have come to realize that there are really very few things in this life worth getting upset about. More and more, my philosophy is boiling down to, like Karl Barth, Jesus loves me this I know, for the Bible tells me so, along with love God and others. I have found that holding those thngs closely makes things simpler and more complex. I do believe if more of those of us who call ourselves Christians would live in the realization that we are loved by God and are to love him and our neighbor, this world would be a much better place.
I am truly blest by the Father. He has given me a wonderful wife, two fantastic chidlren, and three of the best grandchildren in the world, with one more on the way. Jan and I are part of a beautiful community of fellow Jesus followers. I have been able to do things that I loved, both in work and play. I have seen some amazing things and met some amazing people. As the years have gone by, I have become more and more grateful for all my blessings and for all the lessons I have learned, even the hard ones.
None of us knows what the future holds. That is not in our hands. I am thankful that my loving Father has the future in his hands. I hope to spend many more years traveling the back roads of life trying to keep up with Jesus.
Blast From the Past: More From My Journey
This is from 2008.
Most of my life I’ve heard that God wants us to “dream big”, “attempt great things for God, expect great things from God”, and desire to be “greatly used”. Well, I’ve dreamed big dreams and I’ve asked God to let me do great things for him. And, guess what? *crickets chirping*
That’s right. Nothing has come of those dreams. In fact, most of them have crashed and burned. The dreams have ranged from competing in the Olympics (or at least getting to the Trials), to coaching college basketball and building a program that would be among the best in the country and having a ministry that would deeply impact the campus. I’ve even dreamed of of helping plant a church that would touch my community and advance the community. I’ve followed the advice of Christian motivational speakers and asked God to give me his dream for me, and I really believed he had done this.
I have come to the point in my life where I am done with dreaming. I believe that God does give some big dreams and big things to do for the Kingdom. I don’t believe that I’m one of those people. Through my reading (Bible, blogs, and books), praying, and thinking, I’ve come to believe that God has called me to simply be a follower of Jesus. He is telling me to not worry about where the road is going to go, or what I am going to do along the journey. When I ask, he just says, “You’ll find out”. There were a lot of followers of Jesus in the 1st century that didn’t make it into the New Testament or any of the writings of the time, but they were faithful to what God called them to do. That’s what the Father is calling me to be. And, I’m okay with that.
I’ve often described my walk with God as a journey on the back roads. One of the things about the back roads is that they are away from the crowds, away from the spotlight. Back roads are not the places to do great things or become famous. They are places where a traveler can slow down and get to know their companions, where those you encounter are more likely to give and accept anything that is needed.
So, I’ll continue following my Teacher and Friend down the back roads (and sometimes along narrow trails). There’s a lot to see along the way and many interesting people to meet. And at the end, I look forward to the Father saying, “Welcome home”.
Five Year Plans and Wondering
Last night, I was asked where I saw myself in five years. I had a hard time answering that question for two reasons. First, I’m sixty years old and don’t know how a five year plan fits in. The second reason is the simple fact that I have done all the daily, weekly, yearly, etc., goals throughout my life, including thinking five and ten years down the road, and very few of my long term plans have come to fruition.
I used to be one of those who bought the concept of setting all those goals in order to have success in career and life. I had all sorts of plans. Plans to coach at the college level, eventually being part of a national championship program. Plans to have a great impact in the lives of young people through my coaching.
Before that, I had plans to be an Olympic class sprinter.
Anyone want to take a guess at how those goals turned out? If you have followed college basketball or international track and field with even the smallest interest, you will know that I never reached those heights. While I was an assistant coach of a women’s basketball team for one year at a small college, and I did spend one year running for a nationally recognized track club, those were quite a bit below where I wanted to be.
I used to be somewhat envious of those I knew who had their career track in mind at an early age and were doing exactly what they had envisioned. They had no deviations from the straight and narrow on their career path, while mine looked more like a drunken sailor on his way back to the ship. Not only did the path take some back roads, it sometimes ran along trails that seemed to go nowhere.
I have come to realize that my journey has not been of my planning or of my doing. I know, some of you may be saying, “Here we go. All of the excuses for why he’s not successful.” And, you may be right. I beg to differ. I believe long ago, God decided that I was not to do this whole planning, accomplishing, and succeeding thing on my own. I tried. I went to school, earned degrees, did internships, sent out resumes, all those things I was supposed to do. I watched folks less qualified get positions I was wanting. I spent time in jobs that didn’t come close to fitting my plans. I never did grab the brass ring.
But, you know what? As I look back on my life, I realize that I wouldn’t change a thing. Well maybe a couple of things here and there, but overall not a thing. I have had the opportunity to travel as a part of jobs I had. I have had the opportunity to work with some fantastic people and coach some amazing young folks, whether they were star athletes or not. I have had opportunities to learn some lessons that were life changing. Most importantly, I have had a wonderful wife by my side and the privilege of being a father to two wonderful children, both of whom I had the opportunity to coach. And, I have experienced the love and grace of fellow followers of Jesus that I am grateful to own as my brothers and sisters.
To quote the philosopher, Jerry Garcia, “What a long strange trip it’s been.” I am thankful for the way my Father has led me through all the twisting and turning. I am grateful for all those who have helped me along the way. I guess it’s turned out pretty well. I think I’m looking forward to where the road takes me over the years to come. Should be fun.
Identity
Identity is a big issue these days. You have identity politics, entertainers constantly creating new identities for themselves in an effort to stay popular, and publications and advertising telling the rest of us how to live out a certain identity. There is even a movie coming out that is about a woman who wins the lottery and begins a television program that is simply all about her. All of these have a couple of things in common; a focus on the self, and a very good chance of disappointment.
When I was younger, I built an identity as a pretty decent sprinter. I had dreams of making it to the Olympics. I even made it to being a part of a fairly well known track club, and was close to being a national class runner. I had just one problem. I reached the top of my potential and was not really good enough to continue putting the time and effort into the sport at that level. That identity fell by the way. Then my identity became that of a coach and teacher. I lived that out for a good long time until it too went away. I have had to learn the hard way that my true identity is as a beloved child of the Creator of the universe.
For a person who follows Jesus, the only identity that matters, and the identity from which everything else flows, is our identity as children of a loving Father and as co-heirs with Jesus of everything the Father has. We have been adopted as children with all of the rights and responsibilities of a son or daughter of the King. That identity is something that will never change and will never disappear, no matter what.
This identity means that it really doesn’t matter what others think of us, because God loves us. He not only loves us, he likes us and thinks we’re pretty special. It also means that our future is secure. Not only is it secure, but the renewal of creation is somehow tied in with our final redemption. That blows my tiny little mind! Our identity means that we are part of a family that stretches all over the world and through time. We never lack for brothers and sisters.
Our identity carries with it responsibilities as well as privileges. Because God is our Father, we are to live in such a way that folks see the family resemblance in us. We should be the spittin’ image of our Abba. That means that we strive to treat others with the same grace and love with which our Father treats us, especially those who are part of the family. Our brothers and sisters should be as dear to us as they are to the Father. Since our final redemption is somehow connected to the restoration of creation, we have a responsibility to see creation as something good, to be cared for and stewarded as a gift from our loving Father. That also means using whatever creative gifts God has given us to bless others ands bring glory to our Father.
There is no greater identity than that of a beloved child of Abba. God help us to live in that reality.
End of an Era
A couple of weeks ago, I coached for what possibly will be the last time. While I never say never, and there is always the possibility that may change, it looks like my thirty four year career as a coach has come to an end. There are a lot of memories, mostly good, that come to mind as I reflect on what has been a major part of my life.
It all began in college, where I worked with the goalkeepers on the soccer team. That was when I decided that I wanted to coach. The coaches I had during my playing days had a profound impact on my life, and I wanted to do the same thing for others.
After graduation, I took a position at a small Christian school as athletic director and teacher.During the next four years, I coached boys soccer, basketball, and track. I drove the bus, van, or whatever vehicle was available. We traveled all over the Washington/Baltimore area, and one year drove a group of students all the way to Idaho for competition. We played on city soccer fields, church gymns, and had some pretty successful teams, winning a number of tournaments. One of the soccer players led the entire county in scoring one year, and a couple of basketball players went on to play in college.
The next stop was Cincinnati, where I again served as athletic director and coached soccer, basketball, and track. During my nine years there, we made it to the soccer state finals once, and made it to the basketball final four four times in a row, winning back-to-back state championships. Those teams were among the best defensive teams in the Cincinnati area, and one player ranked among the top players in career points in the state of Ohio. A couple of the players went on to play at the next level, and one is a successful high school basketball coach. After leaving that school, I assisted in a NCAA Division 3 women’s basketball program, where I got a small taste of the life of a college coach for one year. On that team, we had the number one player in three point shooting in the nation.
Our next stop was Rock Hill, South Carolina. There I coached a wider variety of sports. During the ten years there I coached boys and girls soccer, volleyball, girls basketball, and golf (really all I did is drive the golfers to matches and play behind them). While my teams were not as successful in terms of wins as some of the earlier teams, the athletes worked just as hard and were as much of a joy to coach. I also drove the bus, which gave me the opportunity to travel to Florida and Tennessee for tournaments. The best part was being able to coach both my son in golf, and my daughter in basketball. I cannot begin to tell you what a blessing that was to me. I had given up the search for a college job to be able to see them grow up, and being able to work with them and see them come to love sports like I do made it more than worth it. It’s something I would never trade.
The past eight years I have assisted on middle school football and track teams, and been the head coach on softball and volleyball teams. My “claim to fame” is assisting on the 8th grade football team on which Jadeveon Clowney played. I have also had the privilege to coach high school girls basketball on a higher level. I have been the head junior varsity coach and assistant varsity coach, working with one of the best coaches in the area. Those programs are the closest thing I could get to a college level job, and I thoroughly enjoy working with this individual. We had some good teams, making it to the SC AAAA Upper State championship one year. It is that program that I have said goodbye to as a coach.
It’s a bittersweet thing. My evenings will be much more free, and the long hours won’t wear me out. But, I know I will miss it. I have been blessed to be able to travel, to do something I loved for a long time, and to work with some fantastic people. If you are one of those who have spent some time with me, as a player or a fellow coach, thank you from the bottom of my heart. You are the ones that made it such a joy.
Update on Goal for the Year
Well, I had really planned on getting back in some semblance of shape and competing in Masters track events this fall. Unfortunately, those plans have taken a bit of a hit. I found out today that I have a small belly button hernia. It doesn’t hurt a whole lot, but it probably will require some sort of surgery. So that will put me behind a few weeks in my training. I have a consultation with the surgeon tomorrow, so I’ll have a better idea of what is in store.
There is a silver lining. If I compete this year, I’ll be one of the older runners in the 50-54 age group. If I have to wait until next year, I’ll be one of the younger ones in the 55-60 age group. So, maybe it will be for the best.
A Goal for the Year
I read recently that our goals for a new year (or resolutions, if you are so inclined) should more specific than just “lose weight,” or “become a better person.” As I thought about some of the things I would like to do this year, there was one specific thing that jumped out at me. One thing that would enable me to accomplish something that has been rolling around in the recesses of my mind for a number of years. And that one thing is: *drum roll*
To compete in the 100 meter dash in the Rock Hill Senior games this September. I used to be a sprinter in high school and college (in fact, I was actually halfway decent), and from time to time I get the urge to get out and lace up the spikes again. This usually happens in the spring when I see athletes competing in meets. The problem has always been that I have let myself get woefully out of shape, with the resulting knee and other joint problems. As I remembered back on the amount of work I had to do to be able to compete when I was younger, I would become discouraged and figure that my running days had faded away. The last three or so months I’ve been lifting weights, and as I have been able to lose some weight, my knees have felt better and I’ve been able to do a few more things athletically.
The other thing that has encouraged me is reading stories from some of the senior athletes who have done well at the same age I am now. Reading about the workouts they have done has helped me think that I may be able to get to the point where I can compete, at least on the local level. If I start slowly, and build up the amount of training I do, I think I can get up to a good level of fitness for a fifty-something year old man. I don’t have to be as fit as I was in my early twenties (thank goodness!).
So, the decision has been made. I’ve told Jan about it, and now I’ve told the whole world. Or, at least that small part of the world that reads my blog. It’s somewhat exciting to contemplate what is possible in the months ahead. It’s also a bit scary, because track training involves discomfort, and if there is one thing I don’t like, it’s discomfort. But, it’s for a good cause. Hopefully the rational part of my brain will prevail over the part that thinks I’m still a youngster, and I’ll train at a sane pace so I don’t totally destroy myself. We’ll see.
I’ll keep you posted from time to time on my progress.