Blast from the Past: Reflections on Ash Wednesday

This was first posted on February 21, 2010 and has been edited to bring it up to date.

Wednesday, February 26 is the first day of Lent. Ash Wednesday is celebrated by Christians around the world with a service that includes the placing of ashes on the forehead of the worshipers. The ashes are to remind that we are made from dust, and to dust we will return. In the tradition in which I grew up, Lent (like most of the church calendar) was not even on our radar. We celebrated Christmas, Palm Sunday, and Easter. I had a vague notion that other days were observed in other traditions, but we were taught that those days were not important. So, I’m a bit late to the keeping of the church calendar, and still learning.

As I go through the Lenten period, I am struck by the fact that our bodies are formed from the dust of the ground, and to that dust they will return. Because of the brokenness of Creation, we face the inevitable decay of our physical selves. As a more than middle-aged man who has tried to compete in sports at the same level he did when he was in his twenties, I can attest to that. At some point our bodies will wear out and no longer be useful to us. When they are then placed in the ground, they will return to the dust from which they came. As we look around us, we see that decay in every part of our world. Ash Wednesday and Lent are good reminders that we are broken and in need of a savior.

Thankfully, that is not the end of the story. During this time, we take a good hard look at our humanity and our brokenness, but we also look ahead to the time when our Savior will return and will restore Creation. We look forward to the resurrection and the Kingdom of God coming in all its fullness. When I think about Ash Wednesday, and the symbolism of the ashes on the forehead, I think of the song, “Beauty Will Rise.” In that song Steven Curtis Chapman sings, “Out of these ashes… beauty will rise and we will dance among the ruins We will see Him with our own eyes Out of these ashes…beauty will rise For we know, joy is coming in the morning… in the morning …This is our hope. This is the promise. That it would take our breath away to see the beauty that’s been made out of the ashes…”

As we go through this season of Lent, contemplating our sinfulness and our need of a redeemer, let us remember that we do have a Savior who has made us a new creation, and who will one day make all things new.

February

This is the month we hear a lot about love. Most of what we hear is not an accurate picture of what love really is. Especially for those who follow Jesus, love has more to do with action than with feeling, although feeling can sometimes be involved. Jesus tells us that the greatest commandment is to love God with every fiber of our being, and that along with that we are to love our neighbor as we love ourselves. Those two commandments cover it all. Jesus then says that we are to love our brothers and sisters in Christ as Jesus loved us. So, how do we love others, particularly fellow believers? The Apostle Paul, in 1 Corinthians 13 tells us what that kind of self sacrificing love looks like.

Love is patient. It doesn’t give up. It keeps on seeking the flourishing of the other. Love is kind. It is compassionate and gentle. Love is not envious, does not boast, and is not proud. Love doesn’t try to build itself up at the expense of others, but puts them first. It rejoices with those who rejoice and weeps with those who weep. Love does not dishonor others, but instead, builds them up.  Love isn’t self-seeking, but rather has the mind of Christ in Philippians 2.

Love is not easily angered and doesn’t keep a record of wrongs. It doesn’t blow up at the slightest provocation. It doesn’t keep track of how many times it has been hurt or how many times it has done good to the other. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It doesn’t rejoice when bad things happen to others, but it takes pleasure in the flowering of truth in others. 

Love always protects, hopes, trusts, and perseveres. Love is strong. It surrounds the other and shields them. It never loses hope in the other, because it trusts in the grace of the Father. Love doesn’t look for hidden agendas or motives, but trusts the other. It also trusts the Father to do his work in them. Love always stays strong. No matter how tough it gets, or how long it takes, love sticks around.

Love never fails. When prophecies cease, tongues are stilled. and knowledge passes away, there will still be love. Love is the greatest thing, ahead of even faith and hope. When it all boils down to the basics of living as a follower of Jesus, what is left is love.

Sounds impossible doesn’t it? It is impossible, if we try to do it in our own power. I mean, how do we love our enemies when we have a hard enough time loving those who are our friends? We do it because the Father has first loved us and put his Spirit in us to empower us to love as we are loved. Will we love perfectly? You know as well as I that the answer is no. That is one reason why love has to be patient, kind, trusting, and so on. It has to be that way to be able to continue to love those who imperfectly try to love us, even as they try to love us who imperfectly try to love them.

Let us seek to love others as Jesus has loved us, and trust the Father to shine his love through us onto others.

A New Year

Today we enter into a new year. Not only a new year, but also a new decade. Yes, I know that technically the new decade begins next January. But it is the 20s now, so I’m going with calling this a new decade.

I’ve seen a lot of talk about reviewing the past decade, ten year plans, etc. I think it’s a good idea to look back over the last few years and see the changes that have occurred in our individual lives, in our families, and in our world. As I look back over the time since 2010, I can think of a number of things that are different as I enter 2020.

Ten years ago, Jan and I were parents of two unmarried young adults. Now we have added a daughter-in-law, a son-in-law, and three grandchildren. In 2010 I was working as a teacher’s assistant and Jan was working at an assistant living facility. As this decade begins, I am a driver at a retirement community and Jan is semi-retired and tutoring. During this time we have lost Jan’s father and oldest sister.

Ten years ago, we were helping plant a church that met in a bagel shop. In the past ten years the church plant ceased to be and we are now part of a small Presbyterian church that seeks to serve our city. Since 2010, I have lost about 25 pounds and been able to keep it off. My hair has become grayer, and my joints creakier. When the last decade began, we had never heard of Huntington’s Disease. As the new decade begins, we are dealing with the reality of Jan having HD, and all of what that means.

As I look back on the last ten years, I see some happy times and some sad times. I see times of accomplishment and times where I wonder what in the world I was thinking. Sometimes life seemed relatively normal and sometimes it seemed like a long, strange trip. There were times when my faith was strong and there were times when my usual prayer was, “Lord I believe, help my unbelief.”

As I look ahead to the 20s, I don’t know if they will be roaring or calm. I am not even going to attempt a ten year plan and my crystal ball shattered long, long ago. The only thing I do know (and have to constantly remind myself of) is that my Father in heaven loves me and my family with a furious, inexhaustible love and will bring everything about for my good and his glory.

Check back in another ten years. Maybe.

Reflections

A couple of days ago I celebrated another trip around the sun, my 64th. It was good to be with family.

There’s a lot to reflect on as I look back over the years. Our country has been through quite a few military conflicts, none as important to the world as WWII, although a couple have lasted much longer. We have bounced back and forth between conservative and liberal administrations and seem to have lost the center, as the two major parties move further away from each other.

The evangelical wing of the church is becoming as divided as the parties, with one group siding with the Republicans and one group throwing their lot in with the Democrats. We have forgotten that we are not to depend on government to “deliver” us, but only on the Savior who gave his life for us.

I reflect back on my own life, how so much of what I was absolutely sure of as a young person has faded away and how what I don’t know may be greater than what I do know. I still hold to the core beliefs of my faith in Jesus, but that is more and more being distilled down to loving God with every fiber of my being and loving others as Jesus loves me.

Physically, I am feeling the effects of getting older. I move a lot slower than when I was younger, and the only way I can touch the rim on a basketball goal now is by climbing up a stepladder. I can no longer eat the way I used to, and sometimes I forget and misplace things.

All in all, with all the changes, there is not much I would change and very little that I regret. While there are things I might have done differently, I believe that my steps have ordered by a gracious and loving Heavenly Father and that he has and will continue to work everything for my good. To quote one of my favorite stories, “How goes the world?” “The world goes not well. But the Kingdom comes.”

Advent

We are currently in the middle of the time in the church calendar known as Advent. It is a four week period in which we remember the expectant longing of the people of Israel for their Messiah, the promised king who would deliver them from bondage.

At the same time we remember their longing and hope, we look at our own hope and our own longing for our King to return and set all things right. As we look around us, we can see that today’s world is not all that different from that of the first century.

It was a dark time then. The people of Israel had returned to their land, but they were still in bondage to an oppressive empire in addition to their bondage to their own sin. We too, live in dark days. As we look at the world around us it seems as if wickedness and oppression is increasing, and even creation seems to be groaning more and more.

As the first century Jews were divided spiritually and politically, so the twenty first century church seems to have forgotten who its allegiance belongs to. I know that is a broad over-generalization, but that is what gets all the press. We long for the day when the true Kingdom will be consummated.

Like the Jews, we hope and long with expectation because we believe that our King Jesus will return and fully make all things new, that there will be no more pain, sickness or death, and that, to paraphrase Sam Gamgee, everything sad will become untrue.

Even so come, King Jesus.

Blast From the Past: More From My Journey

This is from 2008.

Most of my life I’ve heard that God wants us to “dream big”, “attempt great things for God, expect great things from God”, and desire to be “greatly used”. Well, I’ve dreamed big dreams and I’ve asked God to let me do great things for him. And, guess what? *crickets chirping*

That’s right. Nothing has come of those dreams. In fact, most of them have crashed and burned. The dreams have ranged from competing in the Olympics (or at least getting to the Trials), to coaching college basketball and building a program that would be among the best in the country and having a ministry that would deeply impact the campus. I’ve even dreamed of of helping plant a church that would touch my community and advance the community. I’ve followed the advice of Christian motivational speakers and asked God to give me his dream for me, and I really believed he had done this.

I have come to the point in my life where I am done with dreaming. I believe that God does give some big dreams and big things to do for the Kingdom. I don’t believe that I’m one of those people. Through my reading (Bible, blogs, and books), praying, and thinking, I’ve come to believe that God has called me to simply be a follower of Jesus. He is telling me to not worry about where the road is going to go, or what I am going to do along the journey. When I ask, he just says, “You’ll find out”. There were a lot of followers of Jesus in the 1st century that didn’t make it into the New Testament or any of the writings of the time, but they were faithful to what God called them to do. That’s what the Father is calling me to be. And, I’m okay with that.

I’ve often described my walk with God as a journey on the back roads. One of the things about the back roads is that they are away from the crowds, away from the spotlight. Back roads are not the places to do great things or become famous. They are places where a traveler can slow down and get to know their companions, where those you encounter are more likely to give and accept anything that is needed.

So, I’ll continue following my Teacher and Friend down the back roads (and sometimes along narrow trails). There’s a lot to see along the way and many interesting people to meet. And at the end, I look forward to the Father saying, “Welcome home”.

Blast From the Past: The Story Continues

This was originally published in January, 2008. In the fall of 2006, my mom and dad had both passed away within a month.

I had lost my hero, my adviser, my example. That next Christmas was hard. The biggest thing about the celebration of Christmas for me had always been family, and now I was an orphan.

At the same time a group of us in our church had decided that things needed to change or we could no longer continue there. A few months before this, we had gone to two Sunday morning worship services. One was a traditional service and the other was a more contemporary service. The church was losing people and it was thought that if we provided opportunity for people to worship as they preferred, it would strengthen and grow the church. The contemporary service quickly became just like the traditional service, only with cooler music.

Our group of “revolutionaries” believed that we needed to approach “church” from a fresh angle. We agreed that the church needed to reach into the community around us. We began to meet weekly to set out a course of action and to plan the weekly gatherings. At first, things were moving in a direction that really encouraged me. I was an elder, and had agreed to become an elder in order to try and influence the church in a direction that was more “emerging”. Someone accused us trying to break away and start a new church. I said that I had no interest in planting a new church. (Famous last words)

As time went on I realized that the only way we were going to do what we believed God wanted us to do was to actually begin a new church under the auspices of the original church, with our own leadership. Unfortunately, there were a number of people in leadership, as well as other influential members, who wanted to have a say in what we were doing. We were accused of dividing the church and conditions were put on what we were doing. The conditions were probably good but they essentially put brakes on our efforts. As time went on, the enthusiasm for “doing church” differently waned and the worship service reverted to same old same old with cooler music. At the same time, there were positive signs, so I still planned to stay around and minister where I could.

Toward the end of the summer, I heard about a possible church plant here in Rock Hill. I was immediately intrigued. Some of you know Frank Hamrick. I contacted him and as we talked and got to know each other a little bit, God began to nudge me in the direction of helping in the plant. As time went on and I began to read and study, I became increasingly convinced of the need for a new church in Rock Hill. God continued to work on me, and by the end of December I decided to leave the current church and help Frank.

So now, I’m about to set off on another leg of my journey. Where this one will lead only God knows. If there’s on thing I’ve learned through the years it’s that no matter how much the road twists and turns, and no matter how dark things get, my Father is with me and is leading me exactly where he wants me to go. That makes the trip an adventure rather than a chore.

Should be fun.

Blast From the Past: More

It’s another day, so I’ll continue my story.

About three years ago (now about fifteen years), God started doing some things in me that would change the way I saw life and ministry. Through a “chance” look at a magazine, I discovered TheOoze.com and immediately began to read the articles and enter into the discussions. I became aware that there were a lot of others out there that just didn’t quite fit in the cubbyholes that “church” tried to put us in. I began to read authors outside of what I knew as mainstream Christianity, people like Brian McLaren, Leonard Sweet, Phillip Yancey, Mike Yaconelli, John Fischer, Rob Bell, N.T. Wright, and others.

God began to show me that at least part of what I had been taught and believed was not Biblical, but was simply a part of the culture of mid to late twentieth century America. So, now my rebellious spirit had a legitimate focus. Now, I saw myself as sort of a “missionary to the fundamentalists”. I began to teach some of these things to my middle school Bible classes. I tried to convey to them that Christianity is more than just mentally assenting to certain propositions and following certain rules. Hopefully some of them got it and will spread the subversiveness.

Unfortunately, this chapter in my life was to come to a rather abrupt end. The school decided to basically eliminate all the middle school teaching positions and give those classes to the high school teachers. They also decided to eliminate the athletic director position, and since I was both a middle school teacher and the athletic director, my contract was not removed.

More to come…

Blast From the Past

I thought I’d go back in the archives and give those of you who don’t know a whole lot about me a glimpse of where I am coming from and what has led me to where I am now. This is the first of some posts I wrote a while ago that will give you a bit of a glimpse inside. Enjoy.

I started my journey as a follower of Jesus when I was four years old. I know that may seem young, but I distinctly remember asking God to forgive my sins and save me, and I believe that’s when I became his child. Obviously, at that age, I didn’t have a clue about how this was going to work out in my life. I grew up as a pretty good kid, started a period of rebellion as a teenager, went to a conservative Bible college where the rebellion continued, actually graduated and began a few years of ministry in Christian schools.

My rebellion continued, but changed from a general fighting against “authority” to a realization that a lot of the things I was taught in fundamentalism were not only not sensible, but were not even Biblical. For awhile I tried to still minister in fundamental schools, while growing increasingly frustrated with the legalism and lack of grace and love that I saw around me and sometimes experienced. I know that I was seen as a “black sheep” by many.

About three years ago, God began to take me on a part of the journey that would change my life.

But, that’s a story for another day.