Category: joy

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Lessons Learned in a Lifetime

Yesterday marked the end of my 59th journey around the sun. It was a good day, capping off with a pizza dinner with Jan, my sister, who shares the same birthday, and her family. I spent some time thinking about some of the things I’ve learned over the past almost six decades. These are not in any particular order, and I will probably think of others later, but here they are.

1. There is a God, and it’s not you. One of the hardest lessons I’ve had to learn over the years is that there is a whole lot that I can not control. Thankfully, I trust that my Father in heaven loves me and is in control, even when I can’t understand what is happening.

2. Love those around you, especially your family. They will be gone far too quickly.

3. Enjoy your children while they are growing up. Spend time with them and treasure each moment. The time will quickly come when they will be grown and not around as much. You will  miss them.

4. Enjoy your grown children as fellow adults and friends. They may ask you for advice, they may not. Let them be who they are, and enjoy them.

5. Never, ever sit on a glass fishbowl. Trust me. You don’t want to do this. It’s not fun.

6. Hold most things loosely. Money, possessions, friends, ideas. As life changes, and changes you, so many things you think are important turn out to not be. Don’t make it worse by grasping too tightly.

7. Be teachable. Too many folks go through their lives never exploring, never learning new things. Don’t stop learning.

8. You are not always right. I am convinced that when we stand before God and wait for him to tell us how right some of our pet dogmas were, that he’ll shake his head, chuckle, and tell us that we all had it wrong.

9. Love. Love your family. Love your friends, Love your neighbors. Love your enemies.

10. Love even when they don’t accept your love. Loving is your calling. What they do is between them and God, and is not your responsibility. Love them anyway. Love as Jesus loved you. In case you forget, he gave his life for you.

11. Forgive and seek reconciliation. When Jesus told us to forgive and seek reconciliation over and over again, he probably meant that it was something important to do.

12. Husbands, love your wives as Christ loved the church. In other words, give yourself up for her. Period.

13. Don’t be a lone ranger. We can’t go it alone. It is scary, living in community with other folks. It will get messy. It is also the way to love and be loved, and to disciple one another as we learn to follow Jesus together. I’m not advocating a “be in church every time the doors are open” mentality, but rather doing life together with fellow followers of Jesus, sharing each others’ lives, stories, joys, and sorrows.

14. Enjoy the world around you. Creation is not an evil place that we hope to escape some day. It is something that God said was good, and that will be restored one day. The people around you are not your enemies. They are folks in need of the gospel, just like we all are.

15. God’s grace is truly amazing. God’s grace is far wider and deeper than any of us can hope to imagine. I don’t know how all that shakes out theologically (see lesson 8, above), but I do know that we can trust a loving God and his grace.

16. Live free. If you belong to Jesus, God has freed you from sin and guilt, and you can live as a free son rather than a slave. Don’t let anyone tell you otherwise. As a wise man once said, “Love God, and do as you please.”

Some of these lessons have been harder to learn than others, but they have all been valuable. What has God taught you over your life?

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Third Sunday of Advent

Joy to the world! The Lord is come
Let earth receive her King!
Let every heart prepare Him room
And heaven and nature sing
And heaven and nature sing
And heaven, and heaven and nature sing
Joy to the world! the Savior reigns
Let men their songs employ
While fields and floods
Rocks, hills and plains
Repeat the sounding joy
Repeat the sounding joy
Repeat, repeat the sounding joy
No more let sins and sorrows grow
Nor thorns infest the ground
He comes to make
His blessings flow
Far as the curse is found
Far as the curse is found
Far as, far as the curse is found
He rules the world with truth and grace
And makes the nations prove
The glories of His righteousness
And wonders of His love
And wonders of His love
And wonders and wonders of His love


Rejoice! The King has come and he will come again to make all things right. Rejoice!

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To Jennie On the Eve of Your Wedding

When you came into our lives we knew that the day would come when you would fly from the nest and begin a new chapter in your life. That day is upon us and we could not be any more proud of you or any happier for you. You have brought so much joy into our lives and it is wonderful to see how God has blessed you.

We are so proud of the woman you have become, and we are so pleased that God has brought you and Charlie together. We think he will be a good husband, who will love you as Christ loved the Church.

Jennie, we pray for God’s richest blessings on your marriage, as you travel through life together. May your lives be filled with joy and love. May the Father draw you close to him and fill you with his grace and love. We love you so much!

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Do What You Do

This was originally posted on another blog in February, 2006.

I just saw an Italian female figure skater finish her Olympic routine. She had retired in 2002, but came out of retirement just to skate in her home country. She really didn’t have a chance to medal, but it was enough for her to skate at home. Near the end of her program she did two spin jumps in a row and nailed both of them. She threw up her hands and you could just feel the joy. I actually got chills and thought that, even though she might not realize it, she was bringing glory to God by doing what she had been gifted to do and thoroughly exulting in doing it well. It reminded me of what Eric Liddell said in Chariots of Fire – “God made me fast, and when I run I can feel His pleasure.”

How would our lives be if we recognized what God made us to do, and felt His pleasure when we did it to the best of our ability? What would our witness to the culture look like? I suspect far different than it currently does.

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For My Beautiful Wife

Today is the thirty-third anniversary of the day I married my beautiful wife Jan. When we wed, we vowed to stick with the other through better or worse, health or sickness, etc. At the time neither of us really knew what that all entailed. As the years have passed, we’ve learned a bit of what it means to support each other in the good and the bad.

Through it all, I have been blessed to have such a gracious partner by my side. In Genesis, we are told that God thought it not good for man to be alone so he created a helper suitable (meet) for him. In the Hebrew the words translated “help meet” could be translated as a “helper who complements.” Not a helper in the sense of a servant, but a helper in the sense of a rescuer or deliverer. The word “ezer” is used of God as a deliverer. The word “k’enegdo” can be translated “against” or “opposite.” The idea is something which corresponds to, like a mirror image. So, you could say that a wife is to be a deliverer who mirrors her husband. Opposites attract right?

Jan has certainly been an ezer k’enegdo for me. She has been my deliverer by her love and loyal support. She is a complement to me and I have learned much from her through the years. I can not imagine what it would have been like without her through the moves, the job losses, the losses of my parents, and all the other ups and downs of life. As I look back over thirty-three years, I marvel at the grace of a loving Abba who knew exactly who I needed. I can’t fathom it.

Jan, it’s been an absolutely wonderful journey together these thirty-three years. I can’t imagine life with anyone else, and I pray the Father gives us many more years together. You are a tremendous blessing to me. I love you.

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Let’s Dance

The Trinity has been described as a “divine dance.” The word in Greek is perichoresis, a word meaning to dance around. This divine dance describes the relationship between the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit. It is a relationship of mutual love and service, a relationship in which each one is centered around the other. This can be symbolized in the triquetra and other designs that show three interlocking rings, triangles, or fish symbols. The Trinity is a relationship that gives to the other, exalts the other, and serves the other.

As we begin to follow Jesus, we are invited to join in this dance. God created us, not to give God joy, but to receive the joy that already existed within the Trinity. We join in this perichoresis, this divine dance, by centering our selves in God. We recognize that it’s not all about us, but that it is all about God. Ultimate reality can only be found in God. We are invited to play a part in that reality and join in God’s story. It’s mind blowing to think that the Creator wants us to be a part of what he is doing to restore the creation and reconcile all things.

This invitation also has implications for us as we enter into the dance. The first is realizing that our lives are to revolve around God. God is to be the sun around which we orbit. As a baby learns that the world doesn’t revolve around him, so must we. We are to be all about doing the will of the Father as Jesus was. We are to seek his interests, exalt him, and give ourselves to him. We are to love God with every fiber of our beings. As we enter more and more into this dance, we find that forgetting about ourselves and orbiting around God is a joy rather than a drudgery.

The second implication is that we must also remember that there are others who are in this dance with us. Our brothers and sisters in Christ are dancing as well, and those who haven’t come to faith in Christ are to be invited to join us. That means that in our relationships with other people, we are not to expect them to orbit around us. We do not expect them to give to us, build us up, or serve us. The opposite is true. As we dance, we recognize that we are to orbit around them. Their interests, their needs, their good is what we are to be about. This means we are to forget about ourselves. That is a hard thing to do. Our natural tendency is to make sure that we get ours, and then maybe we’ll give to others. We do this with our money, most obviously. We also do this with our time and energy, and our talents and gifts.

I believe this lack of dancing correctly is a major reason why churches are ineffectual, and why community is so hard to find. A group of folks who expect everyone else to orbit around them and their interests will quickly fall into conflict and will cease to exist. It is only in the dance God has called us to that we can truly find the love and acceptance we all desire. It is only when we forget ourselves and dance in our orbits around God and around others, that we find joy. The old children’s song that spelled “joy” as Jesus, others, and you, was actually pretty much on the money. That is the dance, moving in and out, around and around, in a constant relationship of mutual love and service.

Lets dance!

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Lessons From The Man Who Ate New Orleans Part 4

In the first three posts, we looked at the cardinal virtues of community, generosity, resiliency, openness to outsiders, and diversity. In this post I want to look at tradition and celebration.

Webster defines tradition as a time honored practice or set of such practices. Tradition is complicated. There are many who see tradition as a bad thing, and it certainly can be. Tradition can be something that binds, that excludes, that stifles. Many of the conflicts between Jesus and the religious leaders of his day were about tradition. Tradition can be lifted up to something more important than it is, even to the point of something close to worship. Church programs, styles of music, or any number of things are sometimes elevated to almost the level of Scripture. A common phrase in some circles is, “We’ve always done it this way,” when an opportunity for change comes along. Tradition can take precedence over the good of others, and can keep us from loving them. Jesus was very clear about the wrongness of putting tradition ahead of loving others and doing good to them.

On the other hand, tradition can be a good, life affirming thing. It can draw folks close and build them up. A family gathering around a table can be a good tradition. Certain practices in the church can be good traditions and can connect us with others and with those who have gone before us in the faith. Traditions can keep us in touch with our heritage, give us a sense of oneness with others, and make us feel a part of something beyond ourselves. There are many today who are rediscovering some of the traditions of centuries past, and who are experiencing a deeper faith because of it.

One of the traditions that can be a good thing is the tradition of celebration. The people of God have a long history of celebration. Israel was given days of feasting as well as days of fasting. In Deuteronomy 14:22-26, the people were even told they could sell their tithe for silver and buy enough food, wine, and strong drink to have a feast with their families. The Israelites were a celebratory people. Jesus came and spent so much time celebrating that his critics accused him of being a glutton and a drunk. When asked why his disciples didn’t fast, he replied that there was no reason to fast at that time, that it was time to celebrate! Of course, those of us who follow the resurrected Christ have the best reason of all to celebrate. We are accepted by God because Jesus gave his life and then rose from the dead! Death has been defeated! If that’s not a reason to celebrate than I don’t know what is! N.T. Wright states that our Easter celebrations should be blow out affairs, with champagne! He says that we should party so boisterously that others look at us and wonder why. I think I agree with him. Think of all the things we celebrate. Is there really anything worth celebrating as much as the resurrection of our King, guaranteeing our resurrection? Even if we don’t want to throw a huge party to celebrate what the Father has given us, we should at least be people who celebrate and not folks who go around looking down all the time. Even in the midst of the mess and suffering of life, we know we are loved by the One who is going to renew all things, and that we are being renewed as well.

Let us be people who hold to those traditions that bring us closer to Christ and who are free to celebrate with abandon the grace and mercy we have been given. 

Part 1
Part 2
Part 3