Category: Life

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Blast From the Past: Free!

This was first posted on February 24, 2011.

I read a couple of posts this morning that started the wheels turning in my head (that’s what the squeaking noise was). The first post was by Dan Edelen here, and the second was by Jeff Dunn and is found here.

As one who grew up and served in conservative Christian circles, I have constantly bumped against walls that were put up to keep us from engaging in certain behaviors, or to make us do other things. I’ve always been anti-legalism, and over the years cultivated an image as a bit of a rebel. Unfortunately, the image was many times driven by a desire to do what I wanted rather than what God wanted. I was more anti-legalism than pro grace.
I am learning that a reliance on God’s grace and love is what should define my life. The posts mentioned above are part of that learning. I am learning that Romans 7:5-6, Galatians 2:19-21, and Colossians 2:20-23 are good passages to live by. I am learning that my Father loves me no matter what I do or don’t do. I am learning that Jesus took away all my sins: past, present, and future. Not only that, but the power of sin has been broken by Christ.
Sin is no longer the defining force in my life. I still sin, but I also have a Savior that has freed me. When I do sin, it’s not because sin is controlling me. It’s life. It’s part of being a man who is still learning how to follow Jesus and live in God’s grace. Fortunately, my Father doesn’t condemn me, he is not disappointed with me. He sees me as his beloved son. He teaches me and leads me, and continues to fill me with his love.
I’m learning that I am not in control of my life, God is. No matter hard I try, I can’t please God more. I can’t do things that are going to influence God to bless me. It’s not up to me.
I’m learning that I am a dead man. I have died to sin and its power. I have died to this world. I am dying to the opinions of other people, because the only opinion that counts is that of the One who calls me child. That last one will take some time.
I want to be as Jesus, who only did what the Father told him to do. Jeff Dunn says that folks accuse him of being “all grace.” I’ll gladly accept that label. Dan Edelen writes, “Anymore, the only rules I impose on myself on this walk of faith are, am I loving the Lord, and am I loving other people.” That sounds good to me. Jesus himself said that the two greatest commandments are to love God and love others, and that everything else hangs on that.
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Happy All the Time?

I remember different times in my life when I heard people say that Christians are always supposed to be happy all the time, or at least give the appearance of being happy. The rational behind this was the desire to “keep a good testimony.” In other words, it was to make those outside of the faith think that, because we had Jesus, we never got down or discouraged. This was an attempt to show that Christianity “worked” and was worth trying. There are still those who preach that today, as well as those who preach that if anything negative happens to you, it is nothing but an attack from satan and can be thwarted by positive thinking and speaking. Neither of these ways of thinking match up with what Scripture tells us.

All through the Bible, there are instances where God’s people mourned and lamented. There was mourning for their sins, and there were lamentations when bad things happened. The Psalms are full of prayers that are cries to God for help in trouble and tragedy. I can’t recall any passages in Scripture that command us to be happy all the time. What you do see are warnings that we will suffer, that life is not going to be a walk down a tree lined lane into heaven. Look at the people Jesus hung out with. They were folks who had a hard life, who were the downtrodden and oppressed. Jesus never told them to put on a happy face because following him made your life problem free. He never told them to make positive pronouncements that would make them better. In fact, Jesus told those who wanted to follow him that they had to give up everything and die in order to follow him. Honestly, giving up my desires, my wishes, my life, is hard. It doesn’t always make me a smiling, happy person. Sometimes I do it with a frown and a grumble.

The idea that we need to put on a happy face as a good testimony is also wrong. We do a disservice to the cause of Christ when we give the impression that Jesus makes everything peachy. We are afraid to show grief because we are supposed to believe. We are afraid to get angry because our life is supposed to be wonderful. We ask each other how we are doing, and then don’t give an honest answer because we don’t want folks to think that we’re not trusting God. So, we tell everyone that our lives are wonderful, while families fall apart, faith is shattered, and lives go down the tubes. And then we say, “I never knew. They seemed so happy.” It is not the presence of a smiling face and assertions that everything is great that testifies to the grace and glory of God. It is when we are able to say through the pain and the tears, “I believe God is good. I don’t know why this has happened, and I hurt, but I know my Father cares for me.” A smiling face can hide deep despair, while asserting trust in God through tears shows a depth that can only come from the Spirit.

When we are open about our pain and heartache, we open the door to comfort from those who have been through similar things. We come to see that we are not alone. This helps us to see that our Father really is in control and really does love us. This can bring deep, abiding joy. It is this joy that shows that following Jesus is worth it.

Maybe you are going through some tough things right now, and your pain is more than you can bear. God knows. He experienced imaginable grief at the cross. Don’t be afraid to let your hurt show. Be honest to the Father about how you are feeling. Find some brothers or sisters that you can be open and vulnerable with. Let God use them to bring you comfort and grace. We are children of a good, loving, perfect Father and we are on this journey together. Take the masks off. Don’t be afraid.

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Blast From the Past: Back Roads

This is something I wrote a little over eight years ago. It still is true.

I love back roads. When I travel, I would rather take back roads than the interstate any day. I enjoy seeing what lies in those places that most people just zoom by in their hurry to get to their destination. I like exploring and am usually willing to go out of my way to see what I can see.

What is interesting (to me anyway) is that my journey following Jesus seems to be taking me on the back roads. I know people who knew right from a young age what God was going to have them do. I thought I knew, at least in my senior year of high school. One year of Bible college, then two years learning the printing trade. One year turned into five, a youth ministry emphasis turned into a teaching and coaching gig at a Christian school, where I met my wife. After leaving that school, the plans were to get a job in the federal government. Of course, that was the time when the government had a hiring freeze. One year, a son, and a low paying job later, God told us it was time to go someplace else.

A move to Cincinnati brought further adventures. The twelve years we spent there brought a daughter, success in coaching, another job loss, and more education (both formal and informal). After some difficult times the Lord moved us again. This time to Rock Hill, SC.

The place God put us in was in a Christian school where I had applied for a job seventeen years earlier. During my time there I learned how to coach some different sports and how to teach some different subjects. All along God was taking me down some spiritual paths that I had never explored before. I also had the privilege of coaching both son and daughter and watching them grow up. Then, God decided it was time to take another back road.

After leaving that school, I was sure that the road was going to lead to the fulfillment of a long-time dream. I found out that road was closed, and I had to take a detour. The road God put me on led out into the desert, to a dry and empty place where He could teach me more of the things he had already started. After wandering around for a while, I stopped and settled in for what looked like a long stay. The desert school turned out to be sometimes hard, sometimes boring, sometimes frustrating. It was a one-to-one teacher to student ratio, and I had the full attention of my Rabbi. I learned that many of the things I had been taught were not right, that many of my ideas and presuppositions needed to be scrapped. I learned what is really important, what is really essential to following Jesus. I became a disciple of my Rabbi, and finally understood what a disciple really is. Finally it was time to leave the desert.

My journey is still taking twists and turns. But I’m finding out that, even though it may be hard and frustrating at times, I am enjoying exploring some of the back roads and trails that Jesus leads me on. Sometimes I lag behind, sometimes I try to run ahead. But, I am learning that the best way is to follow the Rabbi so closely that I am covered with the dust from His feet. Life is an adventure.

May God bless you on your journey.

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The River

This past summer, while on a break from my bus driving duties, I spent some time sitting on the bank of the river that runs out by the camp. I stayed there about an hour, relaxing and watching some of the wildlife. As I sat, a number of things made their way through my mind.

I saw a hawk and an osprey fly along the surface of the river looking for fish. At one point the hawk dove into the water and came up with a meal. I saw fish come up to the surface and snatch the insects scurrying there. I thought how the river is a giver of life, and was reminded of Jesus’ statement that rivers of living water would flow from those who would follow him, that water being the Spirit of the One who gives eternal life.

I saw a cicada fall into the water and twice narrowly miss being dinner for a fish. The cicada tried to swim to a branch or something to get out of the water, struggling more and more as his wings grew tired and waterlogged. I thought of how the river can also be a bringer of death. It was high and flowing swiftly, and anyone caught in the current would have been in danger. I saw branches and other debris carried downstream by the inexorable flow, and thought of the way life can be. As I get older, I am more aware of how quickly time passes, and how it moves relentlessly to the end. Sometimes life, like the river, brings us death. Dreams, goals, careers, and so on, can die as our lives change. Death is a fact of life.

Since June, I have often felt like I am in a river that is running swiftly. I don’t know where it is taking me and I feel as if there is not a whole lot I can do about it. On one hand, there is some uneasiness because of the unknown. One the other, there is a feeling of adventure. There is a sense of moving into new territory and a wonder at what I might find there. I believe that I have a guide with me on this journey, even though he currently is not saying much along the way.

All along, I have had the sense that God was going to do something a bit unexpected with me. I still feel that way. What that may be, I don’t know. The river may take me to a tropical paradise, or it may leave me stuck on a sandbar for a while. I am sure that it will be interesting, and I know my Father is good and that he loves me.

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What is the Good Life?

A few weeks ago in our gathering, we were looking at the Gospel of John, chapter 5. In this passage we find Jesus in Jerusalem for a feast. While there, he healed a man who had been an invalid for thirty-eight years. Jesus asked the man if he wanted to get well. We could restate that question as, “What is the good life?”

There are at least three answers to that question. Each of us has our own. The first answer came from the man himself. “I don’t have anyone to help me.” I can’t do it. He was looking for someone else to provide for him.While I would guess that he did want to get well, it’s also possible that he had become comfortable in his condition and was content to just lay there and let others take care of him. Perhaps he had given up. His idea of the good life was to be physically whole and it just wasn’t happening. Many times we get the idea that the good life involves good health, a nice house, late model car, and smart children who do well in school. In other words, the American Dream. Those are good things that God sometimes blesses us with. Jesus did heal the man. However, that is not the good life.

The second answer comes from the religious leaders. They told the man that he was breaking the Sabbath by carrying his mat after Jesus healed him. Their idea of the good life was following the rules, being a good, religious person. They believed that rigidly walking in lockstep with the law and all of their addendums would lead to God’s favor. In their thinking, Israel would be restored to its former glory when everyone started keeping the law.

Looking over the religious landscape, there are churches and organizations that would give either of the answers above. On the one hand are those who preach that God’s favor comes in the form of material blessings. Others preach that “being right with God” by following certain rules is the way. While God does provide for his children and there are commands in Scripture, those things are not the good life. One can have material things or follow the rules, and still not have the good life. One can have little and not follow all the religious rules, and have it.

Jesus gives us the third, and best, answer. He found the man that he healed and told him to stop sinning. Now, Jesus was not telling him that following the rules would bring the good
life. In verses 16-30 Jesus states that the good life is the life to come and could only be found in him. Jesus says that the Son gives life to whomever he pleases, and that those who put their trust in him have crossed over from death to eternal life. This life is not just some far off, future thing. It is life that is right now. It is the abundant life that Jesus promised to his followers. That is the good life and it is available to all who believe, whether wealthy or poor, healthy or sick. It is a life for those who realize that they can’t keep enough rules to make God accept them and who fall entirely on the grace of God through the finished work of Christ on the cross.

The invitation is there. Come, live the good life.

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Blast From the Past: Exult in What You Do

This was first published on September 27, 2010.

During the 2006 Winter Olympics, I watched an Italian female figure skater finish her Olympic routine. She had retired in 2002, but came out of retirement just to skate in her home country. She really didn’t have a chance to medal, but it was enough for her to skate at home. Near the end of her program she did two spin jumps in a row and nailed both of them. She threw up her hands and you could just feel the joy. I actually got chills and thought that, even though she might not realize it, she was bringing glory to God by doing what she had been gifted to do and thoroughly exulting in doing it well. It reminded me of what Eric Liddell said in Chariots of Fire – “God made me fast, and when I run I can feel His pleasure.”

How would our lives be if we recognized what God made us to do, and felt His pleasure when we did it to the best of our ability? What would our witness to the culture look like? I suspect far different than it currently does.

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Living in a Broken World

A young wife loses her husband, a child loses a parent. An elderly parent leaves this life. A middle aged man loses his job and sees no prospects ahead. Marriages struggle. Church leaders struggle with the demands of ministry while others succumb to the temptation of celebrity. In some corners of the world, believers are imprisoned and killed simply because they follow Jesus.

Anyone who thinks that because we are Christians, our lives are supposed to be sweetness and light, needs to wake up to the reality that we live in a broken world. Sometimes, life sucks. Things don’t always go the way we think they should and we are sometimes left wondering. At times, the stuff of life can be overwhelming. We are tempted to give up and despair. Words of comfort fall on deaf ears. I don’t have any words of wisdom. I don’t have any explanation for most of what happens. I definitely don’t want to spout out empty platitudes that may do more harm than good.

There is one thing I believe, and hold on to. I believe that God is good. When things don’t make sense, God is good. When the stuff piles up, and the pressure gets unbearable, God is good. When everything seems to fall apart, God is good. As I’ve gotten older and been through a few things, I am certain of less than I used to be. At the same time, I have become more certain of the goodness of God, more certain that my Father loves me and desires to do me good, even though I may not understand what that good might be. Unlike people I have known who said they were trustworthy and failed to follow through, my Father can be trusted to do what is loving and what is good.

Take heart, friends. God is a loving Father who knows what it is like to suffer. His heart is good to you, and he knows the end from the beginning. Even though it is hard, trust God’s heart. Trust his love and his grace. Trust that, though we currently live in a broken world, your Father is redeeming and restoring all things.

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To Jennie On the Eve of Your Wedding

When you came into our lives we knew that the day would come when you would fly from the nest and begin a new chapter in your life. That day is upon us and we could not be any more proud of you or any happier for you. You have brought so much joy into our lives and it is wonderful to see how God has blessed you.

We are so proud of the woman you have become, and we are so pleased that God has brought you and Charlie together. We think he will be a good husband, who will love you as Christ loved the Church.

Jennie, we pray for God’s richest blessings on your marriage, as you travel through life together. May your lives be filled with joy and love. May the Father draw you close to him and fill you with his grace and love. We love you so much!

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What I Did During My “Summer Vacation”

On June 5, the last day of school, I left the teacher’s assistant job that I had held for the past 8 1/2 years. On the same day, my father-in-law fell in his garage and broke his hip. Thus began a very interesting summer.

Because of the accident, I actually didn’t go in for my last day. I won’t go into the details here, but it was time to leave. I had been looking for other work, preferably in sports and recreation, for a few months. I didn’t think it would be a hard or long search but, as seems to happen quite a bit, God had something totally different in store for me. Jan and I spent a good bit of the next few days at the hospital. Thankfully, everything happened in the same city in which we live. There were a few complications, so there were some times when we wondered what was going to happen next. Thankfully, the complications were taken care of and my father-in-law moved into a rehab facility. At the time, the goal was to get him healed and rehabilitated to the point where he would be able to return home and live his life as he had before the accident. During this time a number of possible work opportunities presented themselves. None of them were in sports and recreation, and none of them were immediate.

Fast forward to the end of July. Jan’s dad was finally able to put weight on his leg, so the therapy to get him walking and hopefully back home could begin. We would know something in about two weeks. At the same time a few of the possible job opportunities faded away. The one that remained was taking care of my father-in-law during the day, and possibly doing some tutoring on the side. In the midst of all this, our son found out that he had a mass on his thyroid that might be cancerous.

After a couple of weeks of rehab, we were told that Jan’s dad would not be able to go home unless someone could be there 24/7. So, we went on a search for an assisted living place that didn’t cost an arm and a leg and that would be good for him. We found a good place that was affordable, and moved him in just last Friday. He seems to be adjusting well. Two weeks ago, Josh had surgery to remove the thyroid and the biopsy report on the mass showed that there was no cancer! We are thankful for the way we have seen God provide in both of those things the past couple of months.

This past Wednesday, school resumed. I slept in. I still have nothing in the way of what could be called a regular job. There are possibilities still, but nothing concrete yet, except for the responsibility of being my father-in-law’s financial representative. There is much to be done in that area in the next few months. I may be subbing in a local Christian school, and there are preparations to be done for Jennie’s wedding in September. So, at least I won’t be bored.

The road continues to be shrouded in mist, and the way ahead is not as clear as I would like. I am learning to trust that my Father loves me and wants to give me good things. I am learning to live, not in expectation of certain outcomes, but in expectancy of what God is going to do as he expresses his love and grace to me.

So, the road goes on and on.

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Blast From the Past: You Are More

This was first posted on March 1, 2011.

In our gathering Sunday, we were discussing who we are in Christ. We were talking about how we often react to certain situations and people according to old scripts that tell us we are this or we are that. We listen to lies that people have told us, saying that we are worthless, that we are stupid, that we are unloved. Because we believe those scripts, we have a hard time believing that God really loves us, and we are not free to love ourselves or to love others as Jesus has loved us. One of our brothers played a song by the group Tenth Avenue North titled “You Are More.”

Here are the lyrics:

There’s a girl in the corner
With tear stains on her eyes
From the places she’s wandered
And the shame she can’t hide

She says, “How did I get here?
I’m not who I once was.
And I’m crippled by the fear
That I’ve fallen too far to love”

But don’t you know who you are,
What’s been done for you?
Yeah don’t you know who you are?

You are more than the choices that you’ve made,
You are more than the sum of your past mistakes,
You are more than the problems you create,
You’ve been remade.

Well she tries to believe it
That she’s been given new life
But she can’t shake the feeling
That it’s not true tonight

She knows all the answers
And she’s rehearsed all the lines
And so she’ll try to do better
But then she’s too weak to try

But don’t you know who you are?

You are more than the choices that you’ve made,
You are more than the sum of your past mistakes,
You are more than the problems you create,

You’ve been remade.

You are more than the choices that you’ve made,
You are more than the sum of your past mistakes,
You are more than the problems you create,
You’ve been remade.

‘Cause this is not about what you’ve done,
But what’s been done for you.
This is not about where you’ve been,
But where your brokenness brings you to

This is not about what you feel,
But what He felt to forgive you,
And what He felt to make you loved.

You are more than the choices that you’ve made,
You are more than the sum of your past mistakes,
You are more than the problems you create,
You’ve been remade.

You are more than the choices that you’ve made,
You are more than the sum of your past mistakes,
You are more than the problems you create,
You’ve been remade.

You’ve been remade
You’ve been remade.
You’ve been remade.
You’ve been remade.

You are more. More than what you have done, more than what has happened to you. You are more than what the old scripts tell you. You are a beloved child of the Creator, a co-heir with Christ. You are made in God’s image, more than simply a “sinner saved by grace.” You are free! Let me repeat. You. Are. Free! Free to love your Father with reckless abandon, knowing that he loves you the same way.

You are more. So much more.