Category: Love

Posted on

Following Jesus: Part 3-Loving Others

The second of the two commandments Jesus said summed up the Law and the Prophets is love your neighbor as yourself. This is another way we follow Jesus. In John 15, Jesus gave a new command. He said we were to love our brothers and sisters as he loved us.
The love that Jesus commands us to practice is a love that puts others first. It is a love that sacrifices for others, even to the point of laying down our lives. It is a love that does the same for others that Jesus did for us.

One of the primary reasons the early church turned the world upside down was their love, for each other and for their neighbors. The first Christians were well known for the way they cared for their brothers and sisters and the way they looked past social, racial, and other differences to form a family with God as their Father. They were also known for caring for their neighbors, often  putting themselves at risk. No matter what else was said about the early followers of Jesus, it was obvious that they loved others in a way far different from the culture around them.

It seems as if those who of us who call ourselves followers of Jesus are known more for what we are against and our fighting than for our love for others. We seem to be quite willing to forget the command to lay down our lives in exchange for what we think is power and influence. At times our worship seems to be more about ourselves than about the One who gave his life for us. The things that capture our imaginations are many times antithetical to the Kingdom and are self-centered instead of others-centered.

Loving others as Jesus loved us means giving up our “rights,” our interests, our wants, for the good of others. While we may be willing to step in front of a bullet for someone, how willing are we to give up our time, comfort, or possessions? How willing are we to essentially become nothing so that Christ might be glorified and others benefited?

Following Jesus can be distilled into two commands. We love God with every fiber of our being, and we love others. Everything thing else flows from that. It is not an easy thing to do. In fact, it is impossible if we try to do it in our own strength. If we belong to Jesus, we have his Spirit in us giving us the ability to love as we are called to love.

May we again be known for our love.
Part 1
Part 2 

Posted on

Following Jesus: Part 2-Loving God

If we follow Jesus, we will seek to love God with all our heart, soul, mind, and strength. The problem is that we don’t often really know what it is that we love. We may think that we love God, but our love actually belongs to something else. We pursue a different version of what the good life is, a different kingdom. In You Are What You Love: The Spiritual Power of Habit, James K. A. Smith makes the case that we are primarily loving beings and that our love is formed by habits and liturgies that we engage in. Many of the things that we do in our day-to-day shape us and present a vision of a life worth living that is antithetical to the kingdom of God.

Smith makes the point that our love for God is formed and strengthened by the liturgy of the church through the centuries. Coming from a background where we said that we didn’t do liturgy (even though it really was a liturgy of sorts,), I have come to appreciate the parts of a worship service, from the greeting and call to worship where we are welcomed by God and called to come apart and lift him up, to the benediction where we receive one final blessing from God and are sent out to bring his Kingdom to bear in our day-to-day. In between, we sing praises to God, confess our sin and receive a reminder of his forgiveness. We give a portion of what God has given to us as an act of worship, and we hear the truth, goodness, and beauty of Jesus from the words of Scripture. We gather around the table and remember what Christ has done for us and receive a foretaste of the feast to come in the new heavens and earth.

All of these things have deepened my love for God, his Kingdom, and his people. I have found that they have begun to work in me to wean my heart from those things the culture says we need to flourish. I have a long way to go, but I am confident that God will continue to work in me and give me a heart for him.

May we all come to love our Father more and more.

Posted on

Following Jesus: Part 1

When Jesus called people to follow him, they understood that he was calling them to spend time with him, to listen to him, and to learn to relate to God as he did. For Jesus, this meant seeing God as Father and following God’s commands. Jesus did something a bit different than the other rabbis though. He went to the spirit of the Law rather than just the letter. In the Sermon on the Mount, Jesus taught that the Law went beyond actions all the way to the heart. Jesus then took the entire Law and boiled it down to two commands; love God with every fiber of your being, and love others as you love yourself. And then, Jesus gave us the new command to love our brothers and sisters as he loved us.

I believe that these two things sum up what it means to follow Jesus. We love God with all our hearts, with all our souls, with all our minds, and with all our strength. We spend time with our Father, we learn what is important to him and those things become important to us. We seek his Kingdom above everything else. This involves far more than just reading and even studying the Bible, although that is an important part of it. It involves far more than just hearing sermons and Bible lessons, although that too is important.

We live in a world that asks us to love other things in place of God. There are a number of things that clamor for our affections and allegiance. These things all present a vision of the good life, a vision of a kingdom. Like the Sirens, these things try to draw us into the treacherous rocks where ships run aground and are destroyed. I want to look at that in a future post.

May God help us to love him and follow his Son as our King.

Posted on

Just Jesus and Me?

 When I was growing up, we used to sing a song about how it was “Jesus and me” traveling the road of life together. This went right along with the idea that salvation was an individual thing and that Jesus was “my personal Savior.” While there is a sense in which God redeems us as individuals, I believe that there is much more to the work of Christ than just Jesus and me.

I no longer believe that following Jesus is just about making him your personal Savior or that the Christian life is lived individually. As I have studied Scripture I have come to believe that when God calls us and makes us his children, he is making us members of a family, a body. The word for church means a called out assembly, not a collection of separate individuals.

The idea that salvation and the Christian life is an individual thing has done damage to the body of Christ. If you look around at the Church in the United States you see the results of an individualistic faith. In many places there is a lack of commitment to the larger body. People move from church to church for various reasons. Many times folks leave because of problems in relationships. Someone has done something against them and it’s easier to simply find another church than do the hard work of repenting, forgiving, and reconciling. It seems as if many look for a place where they can be served and “fed” (whatever that means) by a weekly concert and inspirational talk. They aren’t looking for community, or they don’t understand what community entails.

We are redeemed to be part of one another. We are a body and each part of the body needs each other part. I believe the day may come when those who claim Christ will have to come together and live as one body. We will no longer have the luxury of dividing over things that are not worth dividing over. We will be forced to live in harmony, forgiving each other no matter how many times they sin against us and loving each other with a selfless love, just as Jesus loved us. Maybe we ought to start doing that now so it won’t be such a shock.

May God help us to live together as fellow children of the Father who are members of one body.

Posted on

Fruit of the Spirit: Kindness

This is the fifth post in the series.

 Kindness is a term that describes how God has looked on us and treated us in Titus 3:4-5. He had compassion on us and showed us kindness through Jesus.

The Hebrew word “chesed” describes a kindness that is loyal and loving in the book of Ruth. It is more than just a feeling of love. It is a term of action, of doing good to those who don’t necessarily have any claim on us. It is the way people treat little children, with compassion and tenderness.

As the Spirit grows kindness in us, we become people who are loving in our actions toward others. We become more compassionate, not just in our hearts, but also in our hands. Kindness can take many forms. It can mean giving a gift, making a meal, spending time with one who is grieving, listening to someone who is going through a hard time. It can mean forgiving someone and restoring a relationship. It can be simply being available. Any thing we can do to show love to another.

May the Spirit produce an increasing crop of kindness in us.

Part 1
Part 2
Part 3
Part 4

Posted on

Ten Years Ago

It was on this date, ten years ago, that my mom left this life and entered the next. Today we went to the memorial service for the wife of a friend of my father-in-law. As family members spoke of their wife and mother, my mind went back to that day when we said goodbye to the one who had given me birth.

It was a bit hard to hear others speak of their mother on the tenth anniversary of my mom’s passing. I thought back, as I heard the sons speak lovingly of their mom. While the last couple of years of my mom’s life were spent dealing with the devastating effects of Alzheimer’s, I can look back beyond that time to the person she was before the disease so cruelly took her away.

The thing that stands out most in my mind was the quiet, solid faith of my mother. She was not a theologian or one who taught great numbers of people. But, her life had an impact on me, my sister, our children, and many others. She was what C. S. Lewis would have called a mere Christian.

Jesus said that one of the defining characteristics of his followers would be their love. That was certainly true of my mother. She was known as one who loved. Her love for her husband and for her children was evident to all. Her love for others outside of her family was obvious to all who knew her.

Mom was kind and hospitable to all, and was generosity was well known. She was the epitome of grace and love to all who knew her. I pray that some of that was passed down to me. While the last years of her life were hard on her, and on us, I am thankful for the memories of a mother who kept the greatest commandments, who truly loved God and loved others.

Posted on

Fruit of the Spirit: Love

I want to take some time the next few posts and look at the fruit of the Spirit in Galatians 5 and ask ourselves how much the Spirit has been producing in us.

The first fruit is love. Love is more than just a warm, fuzzy feeling that you can just as easily get from swallowing a caterpillar. It is an inward feeling, true, but it is one that manifests itself in outward actions for the good of another. Jesus tells us that we are to love others as he loved us. That love is a sacrificial love that is concerned with the well-being of others. Jesus said that the greatest love is to lay down our lives for others.

It is good to ask ourselves from time to time, “Do I put others first?” “Do I work for the good of others?” “Am I willing to lay down my desires, my wishes, my agenda?” “Am I willing to compromise (without sinning) for the good of another? In short, “Am I willing to give my life for the well-being of others, regardless?”

I know that this is something that I sometimes struggle with, at least as far as motivation goes. That’s why community is vital. We need the encouragement and examples of others. I am thankful for what I see in so many of my brothers and sisters.

Let us continue to encourage each other to follow Jesus more closely.

Posted on

Lessons From Meatloaf

The singer, not the food. I know what you all are thinking. “Fred’s really lost his mind!” Now that may be true, but bear with me.

In the song, “Two Out of Three Ain’t Bad,” there is a line that says, “I want you, I need you, but there ain’t no way I’m ever gonna love you.” I wonder if this might be descriptive of many in the church in the 21st century.

One thing I do believe is true is that many in the American evangelical church have a hard time being in community with other believers. I’m not talking about gathering in a worship setting once a week, although that is a vital part of community. I’m talking about spending time with other believers, gathering in homes and other places and digging beneath the surface to build up and challenge each other in following Jesus. That is community, and it can be messy at times.

I think many are saying, “I want you, I need you, but there ain’t no way I’m ever gonna love you.” In other words, they crave community, being known and loved for who they are. They want to be loved and accepted. They recognize their need for community. But.

But, when it comes down to the hard stuff, the hard work of loving as Jesus loves us, the messiness of sacrificially loving others with all their warts and blemishes, that’s a different story. Then it becomes, “ain’t no way!” Some hang out on the periphery, never quite throwing their lot in fully. Others find a church that only asks that they show up once a week and put their money in the offering plate.

Although we do want and need to be part of a fellowship that accepts and loves us, and that challenges us, it is not really about our wants and needs. It is about obeying what our King told us to do, to love one another and to lay down our lives for each other. That is how the world will know we belong to Jesus, not by how we vote or what position we take on social issues. The first Christians, with all their flaws, learned to live with and love folks from all kinds of backgrounds and with all sorts of issues. Even though they were far from perfect, they were known throughout the world for their love for each other and for those outside. And, they turned the world upside down.

May God help us to say, “I want you, I need you, and I will love you no matter what it takes.”

Posted on

Sticks, Stones, and Words

“Sticks and stones may break my bones, but names will never hurt me.” So goes the schoolyard chant. I beg to differ. While it may be true that sticks and stones may break bones, it is equally true that words can hurt, often in ways far worse than physical damage.

Now I don’t agree with the current way of thinking that wants “trigger warnings,” “safe places,” and other means of shielding people from speech and ideas that might challenge their own thinking. The desire to only see and hear what agrees with your presuppositions is a fast track to fear and ignorance. The lack of civil discourse is a growing problem in our society, even in the church.

I would agree that there is a point where we can become too careful with our words, walking on verbal eggshells in order to avoid making anyone feel bad. At the same time, I believe that those of us who follow Jesus are called to be careful with our speech. While we are to speak truth, we are called to do so in love. In the Sermon on the Mount, Jesus says that using terms of contempt is equal to murder. Ephesians 4:29 tells us we are to not let any corrupting or unwholesome talk come out of our mouths but only say things that build one another up. I believe this goes beyond just an admonition to avoid cussing and dirty jokes.

In his letter, James tells us that our tongues should be instruments of blessing rather than cursing. Paul says that our words should be gracious and add “flavor” to others. All through Scripture we are commanded to guard our speech, to say things that build others up rather than tearing them down.

Most of can remember times when the words of another cut us to the quick and caused long lasting damage. If we’re honest, we can also remember times when we have done the same. Churches have split over things that have been said, as have whole denominations. Hateful, evil speech is not just a problem outside the church.

Jesus said that the world would know we are his by our love to one another. May we follow our Master and King by being careful and gracious with our words, and also being gracious and forgiving toward those who blow it, because we all will.
Let us grow more and more into the likeness of Christ Jesus in everything, including how we use our tongues.

Posted on

Blast From the Past: Out of the Cave, Into the…

This was first posted on February 6, 2012. The healing process had begun.

Some of you have read my recent post about finding myself in a cave. I’m now out of the cave, although still not far from the entrance. I now find myself in the middle of a thicket, sort of like a stand of rhododendron or mountain laurel, so thick that you cannot see out of it. It is still somewhat dark, and the direction I should take is unclear. I see many paths out, but don’t know yet which one to take.

There is the path that would take me back into the church world I left a few years ago. Next to it is the path that would take me to the land of the mega-church. Here I could find a place to hide and lick my wounds. One path seems to go in circles, and looks as if it would leave me no better off. Yet another way out continues in the search for community. That is the path that interests me the most, and the way that I have learned most about in the last couple of days.

You see, I have learned something about community, and about myself. I think I’m beginning to learn why I spent time in the dark cave. Anyone who knows me will tell you that I am a pretty laid back individual, but that when I am passionate about something, I tend to go all out. As I learned more and more about the God’s desire for his children to live as brothers and sisters because of Christ, I became more and more passionate with living in community. Dietrich Bonhoeffer said, “The person who loves their dream of community will destroy community, but the person who loves those around them will create community.” As I look back on the past year, and my desire to have and fight for community, I realize I inadvertently pushed it too hard and may have been part of the cause of its destruction. I know that my heart was good, but I think I may have wanted community so badly that I didn’t see the problems that it was causing. Even though I tried to sacrificially love those around me, I think that I didn’t leave room for God to work, thinking that as long as we spent enough time together, growth and maturity would automatically happen.

I now realize that community is something that has to happen naturally, as God’s people learn to love one another. It is something that cannot be forced, and the Holy Spirit must be the one to form it rather than humans whose motives can be tainted by our own needs. I also realize that a particular form of community may not last as long as I think, and that I need to be willing to let it go when it is time. For those of you reading this who have been on the receiving end of my misguided efforts, I am sorry. I put the ideal of community ahead of my brothers and sisters. I was wrong.

As to what is next in this journey along the back roads, only God knows. I know that Jan and I still desire to share our lives with some fellow Christ-followers. I also know that it may not take any form that we expect. It may be in a regular gathering. It may take place in just getting together with one or two who share our desire. What I also know is that I want it to be something that happens as Christ’s Spirit moves, not when I think it should happen.

I’m learning to trust my Father. As I leave the thicket, I want to be hear my Shepherd’s voice and follow him wherever he leads, whenever he leads, and to whatever he leads. I would appreciate your prayers.